


Zelda, Tank Girl

by Slouchtonirvana



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Alcohol, Developing Relationship, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Past Relationship(s), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recreational Drug Use, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:41:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26513119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slouchtonirvana/pseuds/Slouchtonirvana
Summary: I'm really bad at titles. Anywho, I was thinking the other day, if I was SS crawling out of the vault, the first thing I would look for is some goddamn coffee, and this OC was created. Kinda canon, kinda not. What if she knew right away that her child was already gone and grown? I have taken some liberties with the story. Also wrote Nate in the fashion of my own ex-husband, and Zelda (named after my cat) is written in my fashion. Also bad at summaries.
Relationships: John Hancock (Fallout)/Original Character(s), John Hancock/Female Sole Survivor, Robert Joseph MacCready/Female Sole Survivor
Comments: 10
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

When Zelda had finally made her way to the lighted gates, she could barely tell the letters in the name made out on the neon sign. “Goodneighbor?” She said to herself. She had spent hours stumbling through what was once Boston, trying to keep herself from panicking too much. She had one mission in her mind. She just wanted one fucking thing. The gate to the city was opened and she walked in, staring around in a daze. She found what appeared to be some kind of… vendor? Store? And she made a beeline for it. Gratefully, there was someone at the counter inside. Someone who looked quite odd, but staring is rude. 

Zelda kept a smile on her face. “Hello, my name is Zelda. I was wondering if you could help with something?”

The woman, who appeared quite old, just rolled her eyes, “If you are here to pawn something don’t bullshit me and say it’s a family heirloom, I’m probably older than it is. Name’s Daisy. What can I do for you?”

The woman was rough, but seemed kind enough. Zelda approached the counter and set her hands on it and looked Daisy in the eye. “Look, I have had the craziest 24 hours that any human would ever have. And all I would like, if you have it or could point me somewhere that I could find it, is a cup of coffee. Please.” Zelda gave her a friendly smile. 

Daisy just stared at her like she had a horn in her head. “Coffee?”

People had begun to gather outside to look at the newcomer who was acting weird. In the corner of Zelda’s eye she saw a flash of red, someone wearing red, who approached the counter with Daisy to look at her as she talked. “Okay. You don’t know me from Adam, I get that. Yesterday, I was getting my son ready for Halloween with my husband when we got the warning for nuclear bombs on TV. We ran to the vault,” Zelda did her best to blink back tears but her voice still waivered, “And then, they put us in pods that they told us were for decontamination but they actually froze us cryogenically. For some reason this morning, hundreds of years later, I woke up. Every other pod had failed and inside was a corpse, including the one with my husband. Yesterday I was a housewife and mother and today I am in a post-apocalyptic world and I have nothing and nowhere to go and no one. And all I really, really want, is a cup of coffee and a cigarette. If I had a cup of coffee everything would be okay.” 

The woman behind the counter just stared at her. Zelda knew her story wasn’t believable, and was surprised when Daisy said, “You’re from Vault 111.”

Zelda just nodded when the person in a red coat beside her shifted, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and handing her one. With shaking hands she took it, turning to thank him when she noticed this person was marked like Daisy was. 

“Coffee is really hard to come by these days, but I might be able to spare you a cup,” Daisy said, turning to the stove to heat water for her. The man with the odd red coat was ushering away the crowd that had gathered, and Daisy was sitting her down at a small table that had a few chairs around it by the door. Zelda sat appreciatively, she was shaking pretty hard. Daisy sat a cup of coffee in front of her, offering one to the man and sat down across from Zelda, with her own cup. 

“What happened?” Zelda gasped. 

Daisy cleared her throat. “They bombed the world, sweetheart. It’s all gone. You are lucky, you encountered a pre-war ghoul.” Daisy chuckled at the confused look on Zelda’s face. “I wasn’t always this gorgeous. This happened after the fallout.”

Zelda looked up at the man. “You, too?”

He laughed softly. “No, Sunshine. This was an experimental drug thing.” 

Zelda nodded, sipping her coffee. She was completely confused but didn’t want to seem rude. She turned to Daisy. “What do I do?”

Daisy reached over and took her hand. “What we all did. Just keep going.”

A single tear dropped from Zelda’s eye. “But… I have nowhere to go. I don’t know anyone. I have already almost been killed several times. Some man tried to assault me in an alley. I’m scared, and I don’t know where to go.”

They all sat in silence for a moment. Zelda decided that she was close to wearing out her welcome. She grabbed her bag she had pulled off a corpse. “Well, I don’t know what you use for currency now, but I can give you something for the coffee. You did say it was hard to come by.”

Daisy shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. And caps is money now.”

“Caps?”

“Like, metal bottle caps.”

Zelda nodded, stubbing out her cigarette and grabbing her pack. “Thank you for your kindness. I am getting the idea there is not a lot of that in this world. Be blessed.” She turned to leave, and Daisy grabbed her arm. 

“Where will you go?” Daisy asked her.

Zelda held back a shuddering sob. “I think, I am going to find a nice, quiet spot, and watch the sun set one last time. Thank you.”

Zelda turned out the door when the ghoul in the red coat grabbed her elbow. “Hey, Sunshine, how about you come with me to have a drink? It’ll be on the house. I think you could really use a drink.”

A drink, or ten, sounded amazing. But Zelda didn’t want to be a bother. “Oh, that’s okay! I don’t want to be a nuisance and I feel if I stick around that’s all I’ll be.”

He smiled and directed her out of the store with him. “That’s okay, I like a good pain in the ass.” He looked her over, her clothes mostly ripped and bloody. “Would you like a change of clothes?”

“Oh, that’s okay, I don’t need-” Daisy was already shoving a change of clothes into her hand. She smiled at her. “Thanks. Can I change here?”

She went into the back of the store to peel off her torn rags, once a vault suit that the man who assaulted her tried to cut off. She did her best to still her shaking hands as she zipped up the cut off jean shorts, putting the tank top on over her head. At least Daisy gave her clothes that were kind of cute, even if the short shorts showed way too much of her thick thighs. She stepped out of the back room and headed towards the man. 

He led her down the street and around the corner of a large building. He turned to her and said, “Name is Hancock, by the way. John Hancock.” He leaned forward and opened the door for her. 

She gave him a shy smile and said, “Zelda. Zelda Williams,” as she stepped through the door. Immediately to her right was another, what did they call them? Ghouls? There seemed to be a lot in this town. That didn’t bother her, as long as they were nice. Hancock led her down some stairs into a bar filled with people. He directed her to a booth and stepped away, returning in a few minutes with a bottle and two glasses. She eagerly started to drink. 

They sat in silence for a bit, then poured her a second glass when it was empty. “Are you okay, Sister?” He asked softly. 

“Hmm? Oh, of course! Thank you for the drink!” She had her mask on, was trying to be cheerful to hide how she really felt. What she said earlier was what she planned to do, she didn’t want to live in this world. She shouldn’t be alive, she should be dead with the rest of them. 

“You are a bad liar, you know that?” He smirked. 

“Oh, well, you know. It’s not a big deal and all. I do appreciate you showing some kindness to a stranger. I have nothing to offer you, and I’m sorry for that.” She looked down at her glass. “I’ll be fine!”

He reached out and put a hand on her wrist. “If you need to make some caps, I can help you.”

Zelda froze, staring at him. She didn’t think she had reached that low of a point yet. When he realized what her silence was for, he threw back his head and laughed. “Not like that, Sunshine! Though you are a pretty little thing, I don’t think you could handle this,” he winked, “No, I mean I have some work for you. If you are willing to do a few things for me.”

Zelda shook her head. “Thank you, but I don’t want to be a bother.” She finished her drink and began to inch out of the booth. “I appreciate it, I really do. Thank you.”

He took hold of her wrist again, rubbing his thumb back and forth. “Where do you plan on going?”

“I don’t know, I am sure there are some lovely places to watch the sunset.”

“What did you mean earlier when you said you were going to go watch your last sunset?”

Zelda laughed nervously. “Oh, don’t worry about that. I should go, though! I’m gonna start wearing out my welcome if I keep sitting around bugging you.”

Hancock just stared at her for a moment. She thought he was going to let her wrist go, but he just pulled her closer to him. “Who hurt you?”

“What’s that?”

“Who made you feel as though you are such a pain in the ass that you force yourself to stay away from people?”

Zelda stared at him, shocked. He had seen right through her. Her husband had made her feel like she was just a pest that had to be cared for like a child. She yanked her hand away from him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Thank you for the drink.” She went to get up again, and Hancock sighed, getting up with her. 

“Look, Sunshine, I’ll help you out, alright? It’s what I do. I’m the mayor of this town and I always want to make sure people are taken care of. This is a town of misfits and outcasts and at the moment you fit the bill. Come with me,” he said, taking hold of her waist and heading out of the bar. 

She followed him silently. Well, could be interesting? Maybe she would humor him for now. He took her across the street to a hotel. She stiffened immediately. What did he have in mind? He opened the door for her and she went into the building. They walked up to the reception desk where a very grumpy looking woman barely acknowledged them.

“Hey there, Doll. I’m gonna need a room for a couple of nights for this lovely woman. Put it on a tab, she will be making some caps soon enough.”

Zelda expected the woman to argue. In her time, a hotel room was never given on credit. People expected payment upfront. But she just threw them a key and said, “Top floor, last room on the right.”

Hancock turned to Zelda and handed her the key. “There you go, Dollface. Go get cleaned up, get some rest. Come see me in the morning, I will be in the State building, above the bar.” 

She looked down at the key in her hand for a moment. Hancock just sighed and took her elbow, walking her upstairs. He opened the room door for her and she stepped inside, her back to him. “Come see me in the morning.” And with that, he closed the door and Zelda was alone. 

She sat on the bed and couldn’t hold back her sobs anymore. Her body shook as she let out the screams she had been holding back this entire time. 

Hancock let out a heavy sigh. He could hear her crying as he walked down the hallway, and damn if it didn’t hurt his heart. She had a real shock with all of this and he had a soft spot for pretty little ladies like that. He almost turned back to her room, wanted to go in there and hold her and tell her everything would be okay, that he would make sure she was okay but he didn’t. He headed back to his own place and took the inhaler of the jet out of his pocket, taking a deep hit, and sat on the couch thinking of the cute vault dweller that just stumbled into his town. 

It was early morning when he woke up, got dressed and took his wake up chem hit. He wasn’t sure when Zelda would be by, so he began looking at paperwork on his desk and talking to a few people, those boring mayoral duties. He realized he was nervous to see her, almost excited, so he took another hit of jet to numb that emotion. Can’t be having that shit swimming around in his brain. By noon, she hadn’t shown up to see him. With a wave to his bodyguards he headed over to the hotel. Maybe she just needed to sleep in but he did tell her to do something and it needs to be clear who the boss is. 

Stepping into the Rexford, he saw Allen standing around, selling his chems. He chuckled and said good morning. Allen offered some new stuff he got and Hancock gladly took a sample when Allen said, “You see that new little vault dweller that came in?”

Hancock chuckled. “Yeah, that’s who I came to see, actually. She was supposed to come meet me about some work this morning.”

Allen laughed. “With all of the chems she bought from me last night she is probably gonna be sleeping for days.”

Hancock’s blood started boiling hot as what Allen said registered to him. He ran up the stairs taking two at a time, and dashed down the hall to her room. The door was locked so he knocked. “Sunshine?” He said softly. Nothing. “Hey Sunshine, I’m just checking on ya. Can you open the door, please?”

Finally he heard movement and the breath he had been holding released. So she hadn’t overdosed. Maybe she just got really high. He heard feet shuffling and the door creaked open, and he saw half her face as she stared at him. “Yes? I’m fine.”

He pushed the door open enough that he could step inside and closed it behind him. She took some steps back. She looked okay, eyes bright and nervous, but not high and not sick. “Pretty sure I told you to come by my office.”

“Oh! Shit! You did! I am so sorry. I didn’t do that to like, defy you or anything I honestly forgot. It’s been a weird few days and I think my brain is-” she stopped and winced. “I’m sorry.”

“I was worried when Allen told me you got a bunch of chems from him. Where did you get the caps for that?”

“I was looking through a pack I took off a corpse and found some in the bottom. Paid for the hotel, too.”

Hancock moved to sit in a chair by the table in the room. “What you going to do with all of them chems?”

She shrugged, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I don’t know, just like to have an option around, ya know. I realized when I got them how little I know of these drugs.” A smile reached her face that made Hancock’s heart flutter. “I used to party a lot in my time, husband hated it but that’s who I was. I figure these are similar to the drugs we had back then but I wasn’t totally sure, and I got too nervous.”

“An option for what, Sunshine?” Hancock was trying to focus on the issue at hand. 

She just waved him off. “So, you wanted to meet with me?”

He sighed, knowing he couldn’t push her just yet. “Get cleaned up and dressed, head to my office. I prefer professional as much as possible, plus I need to introduce you to people.” he got up to leave then turned to her, “And if you need a lesson in chems, I am a bit of an expert so I can help you there. Bit of a mentats ghoul, myself, but I could show you the ropes.” He winked and she laughed. 

“I bet you could. Alright, I’ll be there soon.” And with that, Hancock left the building. He was floating on air, like the just took a handful of mentats and a hit of jet. Walking back to his office he sat behind his desk, and waited. 

Zelda sat on the bed and sighed, then got up. She pulled on the shorts that were too short as they were all she had, and a tank top. She would need more clothes if she was going to live for a few more days. The only socks she had were knee highs and pulled them up, pulling her boots on. Looking in the dirty mirror she laughed, she looked like that old comic book character, Tank Girl. A fat and ugly Tank Girl, but maybe that could be her persona. She grabbed the pack and took out random items she didn’t need, and looked at the chems. She took one of each with her so Hancock could tell her what they do. Overdosing on an upper would suck, she preferred to be smart about it all. 

She splashed cold water on her face and pulled her hair up into a messy bun on top of her head. She almost looked cute, and she smiled. Then her husband’s voice popped into her head. “You look like shit. Look at you, why can’t you look like Mrs. Canterbury next door?” She shook her head, pushing his voice out and heading down to Hancock’s office. 

She stepped inside and looked around. There were ghoul bodyguards with guns everywhere, and a spiral staircase in the middle of the room. She recognized this as the old museum. She smiled, that must be where Hancock got his uniform. Heading upstairs she saw Hancock at the desk, leaning back in his chair and boots up on the desk itself. 

“I like seeing you smile, Sunshine. Come on in,” he said, taking his boots off the desk and gesturing to a chair across from him. Zelda sat down, setting her pack by her feet. She just stared at him and he asked, “What?”

“Can I ask you something?” Nervous as she was, she was curious, too. Another thing her husband hated. 

“Shoot, Sunshine.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Does what hurt?”

She gestured at her own face, and Hancock laughed. “Being a ghoul? Not really. It did at first, all the radiation. But once the process was complete it ain’t so bad. Basically near immortality is a nice tradeoff for a nose,” he smiled at her. “I’m surprised you are as okay as you are with ghouls. You don’t seem scared.”

She waved her hand. “I don’t care what your skin looks like, I’m not a bigot. I’m not scared of you cause you are a ghoul,” she swallowed, “I’m scared of you because you are a man, and I know what men do.” She almost clapped a hand at her mouth for her own honesty but she sat firm, trying to not show weakness. She expected him to laugh, but he didn’t. His face just softened. 

“Ain’t that kind of man, Sunshine. And I don’t allow people like that here. Anyone hurt you, you tell me immediately. I don’t put up with that shit here.” He pulled a stack of papers out from a drawer then yelled out, “Fahrenheit! In here!”

Zelda watched a young woman looking pissed walk up to Hancock’s desk. She looked tough, half her head shaved and the hair dyed orange. Hancock pointed at Zelda and turned to Fahrenheit. “New employee, gonna have her deal with some shit. Give her armor and a weapon, something light and accurate.”

Fahrenheit just stared down at her for a minute, then stuck out her hand. “Fahrenheit, people call me Fahr.”

Zelda shook her hand. “Zelda, and yes I am named after what you think.” Fahr’s face looked confused and Zelda blushed. “I’m sorry, I forgot where I am. In my time Zelda was a princess in a really popular video game that my dad was-” she blushed brighter and dropped her face to look at the floor. “Sorry.”

Fahr looked at Hancock questioningly and he just shrugged. “Alright, I’m gonna go get your shit. Meet me out front by the gate in an hour.”

Zelda just nodded as Fahr left, leaving her with Hancock. He turned back to her and just stared at her as he lit a cigarette, offering her the pack. She gratefully took one and let him light it. Exhaling the gray smoke he asked, “Why do you apologize every time you talk?”

“I don’t know, used to it I guess.”

“Well stop, I don’t like it.”

“Sorry,” she said, looking down at her boots. She heard him sigh. 

“Go to Daisy’s and get some food on my tab. Meet with Fahr after.”

“Yes, sir.” She got up and headed out to do what she was told, but stopped at the door. “Oh! I wanted to ask what these do!” She pulled the chems out of her bag. 

He looked shocked then laughed. “Alright, Sunshine. Let’s see, these are mentats, make you feel smart, makes your brain work well. This is jet, slows ya down and makes everything just feel better all over. Med-x is good if you are in pain or injured but it will make you loopy so don’t do it in battle. And this,” he took a syringe and put it in his own pocket, “is psycho. Don’t touch this stuff, hardcore upper that people have been known to go insane on.”

She nodded, turned on her heel, and walked out the door. She went to Daisy and the sweet ghoul gave her coffee and some kind of pastry to eat, and she ate half of it then saved the other half for later. Daisy gave her her own pack of cigarettes and a lighter half full of fluid, and Zelda smoked one as she waited by the bench by the gate for Fahr. 

After a bit the tough woman appeared, arms full of gear. She dropped the stuff at Zelda’s feet and began helping her hook this stuff on. Zelda made a joke, “I doubt this stuff will fit my fatass.”

Fahr just looked at her like she was an alien. People seemed to look at her like that in this world. “Uh, I don’t know what vault you crawled out of but have you even looked in a mirror?”

Zelda laughed again as Fahr hooked the chest piece to her, surprisingly with no problem. “You’re sweet but it’s okay, I know how I look. Is that everything?”

Fahr just pulled out the shotgun. “You know how to shoot, I hope?”

Zelda nodded. “I’m a pretty good shot, actually. My dad used to take me hunting and I-” she stopped herself again. “Sorry. Yes, I can shoot.”

Fahr just cocked an eyebrow at her. “Alright, then this is your mission. There is this place that people keep disappearing to. Pretty sure raiders are involved but I need you to go figure it out. Kill anyone that tries to hurt you and bring me back a report. If there are any bodies that are not raiders there, try to pull any identifying info from them. Come to me at the State house when you are done.” With that she walked off, leaving Zelda alone. 

Zelda checked the weapons, making sure sights were straight. She loaded them both and had extra ammo ready in her pocket. Hefting her pack on her back, she headed for the place on the map that Fahr had pointed out as the gate to Goodneighbor creaked open then slammed shut, leaving her alone on a dark street. She heard screaming and gunshots in the background. She sighed and headed off on her mission. 

Hancock was trying to tell his brain to quit being nervous as he thought of Zelda, alone and out on the streets and fighting raiders. This is just a normal job that was given to anyone, she would be fine. Fahr appeared before him as he took a hit of jet. 

“The fuck is her deal?” Fahr asked. 

“I have no idea. Pretty sure her ex husband got her all fucked up in the head,” Hancock knew exactly who and what she was talking about. 

Fahr took a jet inhaler out of her own pocket. “Men are fucking trash,” she said, hitting it deeply. 

Hancock smiled at her. “They certainly can be. Guessing she is off on the job?”

“Yeah, gave her Pickman’s to do.”

He almost growled. “That’s a pretty hard first job.”

“She knows how to shoot, started to talk about her dad teaching her to hunt when she did that thing she does. Where is her husband, anyway?”

“He died in the vault, apparently.” Hancock looked down at his boots, picking a hunk of mud off the toe. 

“Too bad, he would have been fun to kill. Men who treat women like that are always little bitches in a fight. Well, let’s see how Princess Zelda does,” she laughed. “I bet she is a lot tougher than she lets on. It’ll be fine.” 

Hancock nervously tapped his fingers on the desk, doing his best to ignore how Zelda intruded his brain every other minute. 

By the time the sun had set and it was well into the night, Hancock was a nervous wreck. He was pacing back and forth with Fahr having to talk him out of a search party every five minutes. “Dude, chill. It’s dark, maybe she just found a place to settle down for the night.” 

Hancock let out a growl, “It isn’t safe to sleep out there, what if-” Suddenly the door to the state house slammed shut and Hancock looked over to see her limping in the doorway. He almost smiled but stopped when he saw her. She was holding her side and grimacing in pain. 

“What happened?” He asked, rushing to her and taking her pack from her. She just brushed off his hands. 

“I’m fine. Dude that place was fucking disgusting, even by apocalypse standards. Guy was a serial killer and was making these weird art things with the body parts. Lots of raiders, got them all. There was a holotape and some notes on a few bodies, here you go,” she handed them to him and turned to leave, limping heavily. 

“Wait, we need to look at that injury.”

“Tis just a flesh wound,” she said in a British voice. “Sorry, old joke. I’m fine. Good night.”

“Sit your ass down on the couch, that’s an order.” Hancock growled as Fahr grabbed a medkit. 

Zelda just rolled her eyes but did as she was told. Hancock ignored the snarky attitude. He pulled up her tank top and she yanked it back down. “I have to see it to treat it.”

She whimpered, but pulled up the top just enough to show the wound in her side. A deep knife wound, he could see the muscle underneath but nothing fatal. Fahr handed him clean water and a rag and he cleaned it off, and pierced it with a stimpack. The bleeding stopped and he got out a needle and thread. “You may want to be high for this cause this is gonna hurt.”

She shifted uncomfortably, thinking about it. “You’ll be safe here, I’ll stitch you up then Fahr will escort you back to your room so you can sleep it off.” 

Fahr hummed. “Hey boss, not telling you how to run your employees but uh, I see several more injuries. I think she should stay here for the night so we can keep an eye on her.”

Zelda protested. “Stop talking about me like I’m not here.”

They both ignored her. Hancock pulled out a syringe of med-x, “Good idea. Go get a bed set up in my office, she can crash there.” He moved to inject the chem into her. 

Zelda swatted his hand away. “Hey! What the fuck did I just say? I am not a goddamn child, how about you ask me what I want?” 

Fahr froze in place and Hancock just rocked back on his heels. The room was filled with tension, and Zelda suddenly looked horrified. “I’m sorry, I’m just kinda shaken up. I’m really-”

“What do you want?” Hancock asked softly. 

She laid her head back on the couch. Hancock was worried she would pass out for a minute when she said, “I’ll crash here, I don’t think I can walk across the street.” Hancock nodded to Fahr, who went to follow instructions. 

Zelda was surprised by how gentle Hancock’s rough hands were as they stitched her up. With a smile he took a hit of jet, and offered her the inhaler which she gladly accepted. Between that and the med-x, her mind was floating and her body totally relaxed under him. She heard him chuckle but just closed her eyes, relaxing back into the couch. 

His hands gently removed her shirt and she protested, which he ignored. She felt vulnerable with her shirt off, and tried to not think of her stomach being in the open. She looked down and watched what he was doing and suddenly realized… her stomach wasn’t as big as she thought it was. There were a couple rolls because she was sitting but nothing else. His calloused fingers worked expertly as he stitched up the gash in her side, then rolled a bandage around her. She didn’t think anything of it when his arms wrapped around her to grab the bandage behind her to bring it forward. 

“Thanks,” she mumbled. She didn’t think she could stand up yet and he just sat there, staring at her. “What?”

“Just enjoying the view,” he said.

“Ha, good one. I need another shirt,” she said.

He walked away and came back to sit across from her, sitting close as she pulled the t-shirt over her. She winced as she moved her arms and he helped pull it down, covering her body. “Much better,” she cooed. She let her head stay set back on the couch and closed her eyes. The chems still had her floating and while she was injured, everything was just okay right now. “I think everything is going to be okay,” she heard herself say out loud. 

“It will,” he said softly, putting a hand on her knee. To her own surprise she didn’t jerk away from him. He gave her a squeeze then took back his hand. “Let’s get you into bed.”

She was still pretty high so she joked, “Hey, gotta take me to dinner first. I know how I look but I ain’t a cheap date.”

He helped her stand up and let her lean on him to get over to the makeshift bed. He helped her lay down and pulled a blanket over her, and watched her begin to doze off. “I don’t think you know how you look at all.” He tucked the hair that fell over her face behind her ear and she drifted off into a deep sleep. 

Zelda woke up a few hours later, covered in sweat and shaking. She had no idea where she was and started to panic. She sat up too fast and cried out at the pain in her side, and the memories of the evening before flooded back to her. Suddenly Hancock appeared before her. “You okay?”  
“Oh, I’m sorry-” he growled but she ignored him, “Just moved too fast. I’m fine. Good night.” She rolled over and went back to sleep, her back to him. After a moment she heard him sigh, then walk away back to his place behind his desk. Does he ever sleep? Do ghouls need to sleep? Her mind was racing and she felt the fever all over her. She took the inhaler of jet out of her pack beside the bed and took a hit, laying back down to sleep, ignoring his chuckle from across the room. 

She woke up again a few hours later, still with a fever. This time she sat up slowly in the bed, blanket still over her legs. The room was empty, Hancock must have gone to bed. She quietly stood up, walking around till she found a bathroom to relieve her full bladder. Quietly she hunched back over her bed and began to pack up her things, folding the blanket up and putting her shoes on. She heard a cough behind her that made her jump. 

“Sorry, Sunshine. Didn’t mean to startle you. Where you off to?” She turned and looked at Hancock, standing against the doorway with his arms crossed. 

She turned back to her stuff, hiding her blush. “Just gonna get out of your hair, thanks for everything.”

“I don’t have any hair.” He pointed out.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “You know what I mean.”

He took a few steps into the room. “Yeah, I know what you mean. You ain’t a bother, a nuisance. I would prefer it if you stayed here for now. I can see the fever in your eyes.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to come over here and sit and eat something. Then I want you to just take some time to relax and heal. Get high if you want, I don’t care. But I want to keep an eye on you.” He pointed at the table that had coffee and food sitting out for her. Reluctantly she took a chair at the table. She had no idea why he was being nice to her. 

Hancock sighed as he watched her sit at the table like she was nervous. He had no idea why she was so opposed to someone helping her. There was a story there, and he wanted to dig into her brain and figure it out. He sat at the table with her and watched her pick at her food. “Not hungry?”

She shook her head and watched her light a cigarette as she drank her coffee. “I don’t like eating all that much.”

“We all gotta do shit that we don’t like. You need to eat, I need you to get better. Got some work for you to do when you recover.” 

“Like what?”

“Just clearing some rats out of my warehouses.”

She narrowed her eyes at him as she took a bite of her food. “Like, rat rats, or was that a metaphor?”

He just smiled at her. “The latter. For today, you will just stay here and rest. If you are better tomorrow you can get started on it.”

“What do you have to do around here?”

“Well, I got a lot of books if you are into that.” Man, the way her eyes lit up when he said books made his heart do that flutter thing again. Then really fast, she blanked her face to hide her excitement. Damn, he wanted her to look like that again. 

“What kind of books?” she asked. 

“All sorts, just ones that have been found here and there. Help yourself to anything you like. I got mayor duties to see to. I got some chems in the drawer of my desk if you like. Sometimes I like reading old literature or poetry on a few mentats,” he chuckled and her face did that light up thing again, this time the look stayed for a moment longer before she went back to stone. She nodded and looked out the window. 

“Thank you, sir.”

“It’s Hancock to you.” He got up and walked out of the room, using all his strength to leave her be. 

A few hours later he was back in the State house after talking to the people of his town and discussing profit margins with Whitechapel Charlie in the Third Rail. He heard her talking from downstairs, and saw his bodyguards were looking upstairs where the voice came from with interest. He turned to the one by the door, “Someone in there with her?”

“Nah boss, she been in there reading aloud to herself for over an hour. She got a real pretty voice, especially when she reads that poetry shit,” he said, and Hancock smiled. He patted the bodyguard on the shoulder and slowly made his way upstairs. 

He took the stairs slowly, quietly, listening to her. She was reading Charles Bukowski to herself, laughing at the vulgarity of it. He sat in the doorway and listened to her. Her voice took on a totally different tone as she read aloud, a voice of reverence. The floor creaked under his boot and she turned around, snapping the book shut. “Hello, Hancock.”

He stepped into the room and sat on the couch. “Find something you like?”

She gave him a small smile but stood. “I loved Bukowski, he is so delightfully vulgar. My husband didn’t let me read-” she gulped, “I haven’t read his work in a long time.”

Hancock lit a cigarette. “Why do you like Bukowski? Seems a bit much for a lady.”

She sighed and sat across from him on the other couch. “I’m not that much of a lady. I don’t know, I just liked him. I connected with him on a level. How he viewed the world, and love. I didn’t, don’t, see love as this amazing romantic thing that is shared between two people. Love is painful, is dirty. His later works, towards the end of his life, are surprisingly sweet. He was coming to terms with the fact that hey, he might actually love his wife,” she laughed. “I just connected to him and his world view more than the authors who wrote sweet romances for young women.”

Hancock just stared at her. That was the longest she had talked without saying sorry. She looked up at him. “Sorry, I-” dammit, there it was. 

“Come on, Doll. Let’s go get a drink,” he said. “Wanna introduce you to more people in the town.”

He stood and she followed him downstairs to the bar. Inside, he beckoned her to a table that was beside the bar and brought her a drink. He waved to the merc who operated out of his bar, MacReady, over. Mac grumbled and walked up to Hancock. “What?”

Hancock gestured at Zelda. “This is Zelda, new in town. Zelda, this is MacReady, a merc. He is kinda a fixture around here.”

Hancock watched Mac’s eyes fall on Zelda and a light blush dusted the kid’s cheeks. He wished Zelda recognized more about herself than she did. “Hey Zelda, nice to meet you.” holy shit, Mac was even being fucking polite? 

Hancock gestured at the empty chair. “Have a drink with us, Mac.” The kid sat down without protesting, eyes still on Zelda. Zelda didn’t seem to notice, enthralled as she was with Magnolia singing. 

Her voice was soft when she said, “I love music. I have only been in this world a few days but I missed music.” 

Hancock just smiled as he waved over a server to bring them a bottle. Mac could drink anyone under the table, and he wanted to see Zelda without some of those inhibitions, see if he could get any more of her story out of her. He watched Mac watch her and suddenly he felt uneasy. Maybe introducing them was a bad idea. He couldn’t deny that he felt an attraction to Zelda but recognized that she would never want him. 

Hancock poured the drinks as Zelda stared at Magnolia. “She is so beautiful,” she said barely above a whisper. 

Hancock chuckled. “That she is, all around package that woman. Sweet as can be, too. When she takes a break I’ll introduce you.” Zelda gave him the sweetest of smiles, and Mac broke his staring at her to start on his drink. 

Zelda was quiet as she finished her second drink. “My husband would have been all about her,” she laughed. “He would have been trying to chat her up immediately.”

Hancock frowned. “That ain’t cool to do.”

She waved at him. “Oh whatever, he was a man. Men will be men.”

This time Mac spoke up. “Not all men are like that.” He turned to her again. “What did your husband do?”

Hancock watched as she stiffened up, but she answered. “He was a soldier. He fought in the war when we tried to take Alaska back from China. He was nice enough before but when he came back he was a different person. He got real mean, and he-” she swallowed. “Sorry.”

Mac just ignored her apology. “I heard you were frozen in a vault, from before the war.”

She giggled. “Word travels fast here, then.”

“People like to gossip,” he quipped, sipping his whiskey. “Heard from people already that your husband was a piece of shit, doesn’t surprise me.”

Her jaw dropped. “How would people know that?”

Mac shrugged. “Ain’t hard to pick up. Beautiful woman like you, real insecure and quiet, apologizes for every little thing, how you carry yourself.”

It was her time to blush, and Hancock didn’t like that. Mac’s straight shooting was a little too forward for his taste. But he knew that he couldn’t keep her to himself, she wasn’t even his to get possessive over anyway. 

Magnolia’s singing stopped and Hancock waved her over. She glided up to their table, hand on her hip. “What can I do ya for?”

Hancock smiled up at her. “Mags, this is Zelda. New in town.”

Magnolia turned to Zelda. “Oh my, I have heard about you. How are you enjoying yourself in our little slice of heaven?”

Zelda was grinning. “Oh it’s lovely here, and I absolutely love your voice. I miss music so much.”

Magnolia softened. “Flattery will get you everything. Are you musical?”

Zelda blushed a bit and looked down. “I used to be, my mother made me take singing lessons in school. I won a few competitions but my-” she looked up at Magnolia. “I wasn’t really all that good at it and I ended up stopping.”

Everyone was looking at her, but Mac spoke first. “I’d like to hear you sing.”

She just laughed. “Believe me, you don’t.”

Magnolia just looked at her knowingly then said, “Well I am gonna get a drink during my break. You should come with me to sing some time. I like to hear a sweet songbird.” With that she sauntered off. Zelda was quiet, looking down at her drink. Hancock and Mac shared a knowing look, a look that said ‘how do we get through all of this’. 

The three friends drank all night, laughing and sharing stories. Hancock liked her drunk, she didn’t apologize and told some really funny stories about trouble she used to get into. She had been some kind of revolutionary before she got married, took part in protests and activism against fascism. He could respect that. All of them were pretty drunk, their words slurring. 

Suddenly Mac said, “Well, I am going to go sleep this off so I am not still drunk tomorrow.” He turned to Zelda. “Get some rest, I will see you around.” With that mac stood up and stumbled over to the back of the bar where his cot was. 

Hancock looked at Zelda. “Let’s get you in bed before you get a really bad hangover tomorrow.” He stood up and pulled her up, chuckling at her having to lean into him to stand upright. 

“Oh man, I am really fucking drunk,” she slurred out. 

“That’s okay, Sunshine. I am too. Come on,” he helped her out of the bar and to her bed at the state house. He knew she was healing but he told himself he wanted her close for her own safety, not because knowing that she was sleeping in the room next to him made him smile. He somehow got her up the stairs, her stumbling a few times and laughing. 

Finally got her to a couch and she flopped down. Hancock kneeled down and helped her pull off her boots. Her head was thrown back and she was groaning. He leaned forward, took her hands, and pulled her up. He realized he pulled her too hard when she stumbled forward, holding onto him to keep from falling over. “Shit, sorry Hancock. I’m pretty drunk.”

He just held onto her and helped her walk over to her bed. “S’ok, I am too.” She didn’t flop down on the bed like he expected, and her arms were still wrapped around his neck. His black eyes just looked into her bright green ones. Without warning she leaned forward, pressing her lips against his. He was shocked and didn’t respond at first, then she sighed and melted against him. He brought his hands around her waist and pulled her closer to him, closing his eyes and kissing her back. 

She stopped the kiss after a moment, and Hancock expected her to pull away and pass out. Instead she pressed her forehead against his. He tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “What was that for, Sunshine?”

“Cause you been real good to me, and I ain’t used to that. Cause I wanted to. Cause for some reason I don’t comprehend, I like you. I feel like you get me. I feel like sometimes I can just be myself around you.”

Hancock brought a hand up to cup her face and she flinched away from him. That hurt his heart. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, and eased her down on the bed. “Get some sleep, doll. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Hancock went to his own bed, trying to not overthink that kiss, what she said. She was just drunk, she is alone and has no one. Hancock tried to push her out of his mind as he drifted off but the smile on his face refused to leave.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hancock and Zelda continue to bond, and he learns more about her past. Smut incoming, cuz I am too impatient for slow burns.

Zelda woke up hours later with a pounding in her head. She groaned, and looked up to see Hancock sitting on a couch smiling. She got up, bare feet padding on the floor as she took the couch across from him and he handed her a can of water. 

“Not fair, you look totally fine and not like you are hungover from hell,” she said as she sipped the water. 

“Chems, my lady. Chems,” he said, handing her a canister of jet. She took a hit and relaxed. She was trying to decide if she wanted to throw up or not. 

“So what do you need me to do today,” she groaned. “You mentioned a job yesterday?”

“You feeling up to it?” Hancock’s brow was raised. 

“I’m not feeling up to shit today, but that is my own doing. I’ll pound some coffee and chems and I’ll be fine. Those stimpacks do wonders, I am only a little sore,” she said while rubbing the gash in her side that was already shrinking and healing. 

“No rush,” he said, getting up to hand her some papers, “There are some vermin that have been in my warehouses that need to be cleared out. Be discreet about it, don’t steal from me, and you will be golden. Anything you find on the bodies is fair game to you.”

Hancock’s hand brushed hers as she took the papers and a cup of coffee from him and she frowned. She suddenly remembered the kiss the night before, and what she had said. “Look, Hancock, about last night, I’m so-”

“Sunshine if you apologize to me for what you did I am going to be deeply insulted. Don’t worry about it. I understand.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, I get it. You are alone, and scared. Your whole world ended and suddenly you are having to start a new life. Adjusting has been hard for you. I’m here for you no matter what, I promise,” he said. 

She frowned and looked down at her coffee. She wanted to argue with him about it but he was right. She also couldn’t deny she had an attraction to him but she knew he would never be attracted to someone like her, and she knew that his response to her kiss was just him being polite. “Thanks, Hancock. Do you got a chem that will give a bit of pep?”

He handed her a bottle of buffout. “This will do the trick without being as extreme as psycho.” She popped a pill and threw it back with the rest of the coffee. Hancock was watching her with an odd look on his face that made her blush. 

“Well, I am gonna get started on this job of yours. Is there a shower or bath here? I think I am going to want to clean up after.”

“Yeah, I got a tub. Water isn’t super warm but it is clean.”

“Perfect.” She strapped on armor and checked her weapons, emptying her pack for loot. “I’ll be back later.”

Hancock made himself busy around the State house as Zelda was gone, and kept kicking himself every time he looked at the clock. She was an employee, that was all. He need not be worrying over her like this. But every time the door downstairs slammed shut he perked his ears up for her but nothing yet. 

He worried this job was too much, too soon after her last injury. Fahr kept giving him knowing looks, rolling her eyes every time Hancock peeked to see who came in the door. Finally late into the night she came strolling in again. Of course, covered in fucking blood. A massive bruise on her face that looked like a pistol whip injury, her eye swelling shut. Her bag looked packed full of stuff she got, though. 

He sighed and motioned for her to sit on the couch, getting his medkit out. She sat but argued. “I’m fine, it’s not that bad.”

“Yeah? What happened to your face then?”

“I walked into a door?” she laughed when he rolled his eyes. “That’s what I used to tell people when my husband-” she stopped and looked down into her lap. Hancock froze with the med kit in his hand. Fucking great, he thought to himself. That explains her flinching. She looked embarrassed so he just sat down on the table in front of her. 

“Bring me that gorgeous face, Sunshine,” he whispered. She gave him a slight smile and leaned forward, elbows resting on her knees. 

“Warehouses are cleared out. I got some sweet loot off those guys, gonna try to sell some of it. Might keep the weapons for myself.” 

“You did good, doll. I’ll pay you when I get you cleaned up,” Hancock had a cloth in his hand, pouring water on it and began to clean the blood off her face. She winced, and he realized how bad it really was once the dried blood was washed off. He stuck a stimpack into the area. 

“You don’t gotta pay me,” she muttered.

“You workin’ for free?”

“No, but I got a ton of loot off those guys, and that will be more than enough to help me for now. I can permanently rent a room at the Rexford and get some things I need like clothes from Daisy. I actually already got a few things for after my bath.”

Hancock’s heart went into his stomach at the thought of her not being here anymore when he woke up. He knew she couldn’t stay in this building forever but part of him wanted her here, under his eye to look after. Make sure she was eating and taking care of herself. Make sure she doesn’t off herself. 

“Loot is just an added bonus, every job won’t be that lucky. But I will pay you, no argument about that.” He grabbed the bottom of her shirt and he pulled it up, and she jumped. “Sorry, Doll. Just checking for another injury.”

“Sure you are, Hancock. Totally not a plot to get me undressed.”

“If I wanted you undressed, you would be already, don’t need to scheme to get that,” he joked and her face fell. Something dark went over her face and there went that wall, guarding her. He just sighed and got up, handing her a towel and soap. “Here is stuff for your bath, enjoy.” He turned on his heel and walked out of the room before he said anything else stupid. 

Zelda was embarrassed. Part of her thought after he responded to that kiss, after the mild flirtations, that maybe he did like her. But when he said that she realized he did not. He flirted with everyone, he was just friendly. And he was right, he certainly didn’t want her undressed. She headed to the main bedroom where he slept, where the bathtub was. She filled the tub and climbed into it, moaning loudly as the lukewarm water washed over her. Her room at the Rexford didn’t even have a tub. 

She laid back in the tub for a bit, enjoying this old world luxury of just relaxing. She soaped up and rinsed off, then washed out her hair. Once the water was brown and murky she got out, wrapping the towel around her. She cursed when she noticed she didn’t bring a change of clothes with her. Picking up her dirty clothes, she tip-toed into the main room where Hancock was as well as her pack. She didn’t see him so she quickly stepped in, grabbing her pack and finding the clean clothes she got.

“Heya Sunshine, thought you said you weren’t a cheap date?” She heard a gravelly voice behind her. She whipped around, towel almost too small to cover her to find Hancock. 

“I’m sorry, I forgot to grab clean clothes. I’ll get out of your way,” she turned back blushing, grabbing her pack and turning to scurry out of the room when she suddenly felt Hancock behind her. She froze as his hands gently set on her hips over the towel. 

“Don’t apologize. It’s a nice view,” he said. 

Zelda laughed nervously. “You don’t gotta do that, you know. I don’t like it.”

The hands stayed on her hips. “Don’t like what?”

“I don’t like it when people lie to me. I get it, it’s all some big joke, but I don’t like it.”

She heard a noise from Hancock that was almost a soft growl when he gently turned her around to face him. “Why would you think I’m lying about that, Sunshine?”

She almost fell for it. Almost. She almost just leaned into him and set her head on his shoulder with his arms around her. But she couldn’t. She just turned away from him and stepped to walk away when he stopped her, grabbing her elbow. “Answer me.”

“Men like you don’t like women like me,” her eyes on the ground, face bright red. 

He put his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. “What do you know about men like me?”

She just shrugged. He pulled her closer to him, so that her face was mere inches from his. He looked into her eyes and she lost herself in the jet black void there. She didn’t move back. She knew she should. She should laugh at this like it was all a big joke and leave to her room at the Rexford. But she didn’t. She sat frozen, her eyes dropping to his lips for a moment before going back up. He took the invitation. 

He pressed his lips to hers and they both inhaled with a sharp gasp and she completely melted against him. His hand at her waist held her tighter and his other hand grasped the back of his neck. When his tongue pressed against her lips to open them and slipped into her mouth, a soft moan escaped her that she was immediately embarrassed about, but all he did was groan in return. They stayed locked like that for a moment when a loud cough behind them had them jumping. 

“Am I interrupting something?” Fahr was smiling from ear to ear. 

Hancock held onto Zelda and scowled. “What do you want, Fahr?”

“Oh was just letting you know I figured out what Bobbi No Nose has been up to,” she leaned against the doorway, still smiling. Hancock still had his arms around Zelda, and Zelda felt very uncomfortable with the whole situation. She was beginning to recognize the scene that Fahr walked into and felt insecure suddenly. She tried to step away but Hancock held fast. 

“Well? You wanna fucking tell me what?” He said.

“She is in the process of breaking into your store room right now,” Fahr said, looking down at her fingernails. 

“Aren’t you gonna fucking stop her?” Hancock almost yelled. 

“I’m already on it, she is tunneling under so it’s gonna take a while. I’m gonna let her think she is gonna make it there and give her a big surprise at the end. Got it covered, this was more of an FYI thing,” Fahr turned to Zelda and smiled bigger. “Hey, Zelda. How are you doing?”

The embarrassment was too much for her to handle. “Fucking amazing. Have a good day, Fahr,” she practically growled, pushing out of Hancock’s grasp and grabbing her pack. She ignored how humiliated that she was as these two people watched her stumble through her pack as she found a pair of shorts and a tank top. She put them on as best as she could with the towel, not making them see any more than she had to. “I’m going to my room.” And with that, she walked out of the State house and back to her room at the Rexford. 

“Fahr, I could fucking kill you,” he pointed at her. 

“Sorry boss, she is just so cute when she is flustered,” Fahr laughed. 

Hancock sighed as he took a hit of jet. “Finally got her close to me, finally got her comfortable and she gets humiliated.”

“Why would she be humiliated? Ain’t nothing wrong with what you two were doing.”

“She doesn’t see it that way. Her ex husband has her head so fucked, she thinks that this is all some big joke I am playing on her, that I couldn’t possibly be into her,” Hancock rubbed a hand over his face.

Fahr’s face softened. “I’m sorry, boss. I didn’t know it was like that. Want me to talk to her?”

“Nah, I’ll face the music later. I gotta pay her anyway for clearing out the warehouses.” Fahr nodded and said her goodbyes and left to go deal with Bobbi. Hancock let out a heavy sigh as he fell on his couch, wondering how he was going to fix this because he wanted her close to him again. That sigh she let out? Fuck, that went right to his cock. He wanted her to make more of those noises. 

Zelda was humiliated at how embarrassed she felt. She knew it was all some big joke and Fahr acting how she did was proof of it all. Hancock was a player, he slept with everyone and she was just another conquest. In her room she tried to relax. She took some jet, taking a deep breath. She started to go through her pack loot, separating what she didn’t want from what she would sell. She decided to go ahead and take the pile to Daisy so that she could get a few things she needed. 

Daisy was more than happy to buy her things, which is a far cry from how pawn shops used to be. She was going through the clothes Daisy had for sale and had a small pile of things when a dress caught her eyes. It was one of those pre-war style dresses, a shirtwaist. This one was cute, with a wide flaring skirt and a belt to cinch at the waist. It was a navy blue with white polka dots on it. She looked at it adoringly. 

“I’ll sell that to ya real cheap,” Daisy said. “I bet it would look cute on you.”

“I don’t even know where I would wear it.”

“Put on a dress and go to the Third Rail, have a drink and listen to music. Have a nice night like us girls used to do.”

Zelda forgot that Daisy was pre-war, and knew what it used to be like for them. She nodded and got the dress, with a pair of black slippers to go with. Heading back to the Rexford she sat in her room, staring at the dress on her bed. Fuck it. She deserved a nice night. No one would talk to her or bother with her, but she could feel normal for a minute. Feel like she was just a single lady out at the bar, not a woman who was a merc, making money off killing people for a ghoul. 

With a sigh she slipped on the dress and it fit perfectly. Just a little tight but enough stretch to be flattering. She put on her shoes and looked in the mirror. She almost didn’t look ugly. She had a few bobby pins that she used to pick locks, and pinned her hair back into one of the old styles she used to wear. Grabbing her bag with her few caps, she went out into the night to have a drink at the bar. 

Hancock was sure that Zelda would stay in her room tonight. He needed to drink about a few things. Drink until she was no longer on his mind. He sat at a table with Mac and they laughed and drank whiskey when Hancock noticed the room was becoming more quiet as voices became hushed. Looking around he saw what they were staring at, and his jaw dropped. 

Zelda had come in the door, wearing one of those pre-war dresses you see in old photos. She was stepping slowly and a bright blush was on her face as people stopped to turn and look at her. Hancock was worried she would turn and run but she didn’t. She just lifted her head high and walked to the bar, taking a seat in front of Charlie. 

Mac was nudging his arm. “Go get her, have her come drink with us.”

Hancock shook his head. “Not right now, she doesn’t like me too much right now.”

Mac sighed. “Fine, I’m going over there then. Because in a few minutes every man in this bar is going to be fighting to buy her a drink, and I’m gonna be first in line.” As Mac said it, Hancock watched two men approach her and she waved them off. Mac came up to her and spoke to her and Hancok felt a punch in his gut when she smiled at him, that sweet smile, and he sat next to her at the bar. He watched Mac put a hand at the small of her back and lean into her ear, and she blushed in response. Hancock groaned when Mac pointed at their table and beckoned her to come with. Drink in one hand and her elbow in the other, he led her to their table and she was smiling the whole way until she saw Hancock. 

Her face went to stone. She paused, then decided to sit. Mac sat on one side of the half circle booth, and she went on the other, leaving Hancock in between them with no way to escape. 

Mac spoke up. “You look real nice, Zelda. Where did you find a dress like that?”

Zelda looked down at her lap. “Daisy talked me into buying it. I feel rather silly, honestly, but Daisy seemed pretty excited about it. I think it’s a bit frivolous.”

“It is,” Hancock said finally. “But it’s okay to be frivolous every once in a while. Can’t be practical all the time.”

Zelda looked around. “It’s weird, so many people in here but it’s so quiet. Why is everyone watching Hancock?”

Hancock cocked his head and looked at her. “You really don’t know, do you?”

Mac was staring at her as well. “They are looking at you since you came in the door. Honestly, you can’t tell when an entire room is staring at you?”  
Her blush turned a bright shade of red and Hancock almost groaned for her. “Sunshine, you really have no idea, do you?”

“About what?”

Hancock looked right into her eyes. “How absolutely fucking stunning you are. Everywhere you go, men watch you, even women sometimes, too. Your husband put it in your head that you are ugly, that you are nothing but man, if you ain’t somethin’.” He poured her a drink from the bottle on the table. “Here, doll.”

They all sat quietly drinking, after a few drinks Zelda spoke up. “My husband and I did not like each other.” Mac and Hancock looked up at her, listening. “Times were different then. Women didn’t have rights, we were second class citizens. I was doing a lot of activism work. The last time I went to jail, my father told me I had to marry, to settle down. I couldn’t say no, he owned me until I was married. My husband, Nate, was the son of one of his coworkers. We went on a few dates and he was nice enough, good looking, and I wondered why he hadn’t married. A few months in, I found out why.”

She took a gulp of her drink and kept going. “He was a dick. Manipulative, mean, abusive. At first I saw through it all, but I had to keep dating him, my father made me. Said he was a good match for the family. And after a while he just… just wore me down. We got married and he just completely broke me. He was banging his secretary at work, other soldiers, and he would make me look at photos of the women and tell me everything he liked more about them than me. I wasn’t allowed to eat, he wanted me to be thin like them. He started getting physical when he came back from the war. He would choke me, slap me. Took a belt to me a few times, that has left some scars that I don’t like.”

Mac and Hancock just stared. Hancock felt rage bubbling up but swallowed it down, putting a hand on her wrist. “Ain’t gotta worry about any of that no more, Sunshine.” She nodded and they drank some more. Hancock was feeling relieved when she finally began to loosen up again. A customer looking for Mac meant Mac had to leave to take care of business, leaving Hancock alone with her. 

He looked over and her head was resting against the back of the booth. “Hey, let’s get you home.” She just nodded and let him lead her out. Many people looked disappointed that she was leaving with Hancock and he felt a sting of pride, wanted to shout that she was his and no one else could have her. But she wasn’t, and he couldn’t make that claim. 

He took her to the Rexford and helped her in through her door. She immediately kicked off her shoes before he could even leave. She got a pack of cigarettes and asked, “Wanna have a smoke with me before you go home?”

He should say no, he should leave her be but he can’t and doesn’t. He sat at the table in the room, and she sat on the edge of the bed. Finally she says, “Daisy was right, tonight was fun.”  
“What did Daisy say?” he asked. 

“She talked me into this dress and told me I had to go out for the night, even if it was for a few drinks, like we used to do before the world ended.” Hancock thought about this and wondered if Daisy was up to something, because she had insisted that Hancock go out for drinks tonight, let loose. That woman never missed a beat. 

“Sorry for dumping all my personal shit on you, it was stupid of me to do,” she said. 

“Stop that.”

“What?”

“That shit. Just stop. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be here. If I didn’t want to listen, I wouldn’t have been sitting at a table with you. If I didn’t want to be around you I wouldn’t. I don’t do shit just to be nice and polite. This is my fucking town, and I do what i want,” he pointed out. 

She just blushed and looked down at her feet and he sighed. “Sunshine, listen to me. I do what I want.”

“Okay, sorry.”

“Oh my fucking god, seriously?” She blushed, and Hancock could tell that she wanted to apologize again but she just closed her mouth. He stood up and crossed the room to her, standing in front of her as she looked down at the floor. He cupped her chin and brought her gaze up to his. “I do what I want.” His fingertips gently brushed the brush on her face from the injury before. With tenderness he didn’t know he possessed, he brushed his lips over an edge of the bruise, on her cheek. 

She gasped in his hand, and he gave her a small smile before kissing the bruise over and over. He looked down at her and her eyes were closed as she leaned into him. He just watched her for a moment, thumb still brushing her chin when she finally opened her eyes to look at him questioningly. He pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth and whispered, “You can tell me to stop at any time. I won’t be mad.”

She didn’t move away from him. Bashfully, one of her hands came up to take a fist of his coat, and she kept him from moving away. He smiled again, and leaned in for another kiss. This was less sweet, less tender, more of the passion he was used to. Pressing her back so she laid down on the bed, he leaned over her on one knee, the kiss becoming more hungry. Suddenly he wanted her, all of her. He had been attracted to her the whole time she has been here but now he actually needed her. He brought a hand down to her waist and gently pulled her skirt up to touch his fingers against her thigh, just needing to touch somehow. 

As he grasped her leg, she moaned into his mouth which pulled a groan from him. “Tell me to stop at any time, doll.” He began unbuttoning her dress, and she sat up to pull it off over her head. He shrugged the red coat off and she moved over on the bed so her head was by the headboard. He just stared at her as she took off her bra and underwear, completely naked before him. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. She was so fucking beautiful, how could she not know how beautiful she was? 

Pushing off his boots and flag belt, he kneeled on the bed and crawled towards her, bringing a giggle out from her. He propped himself up on his elbows on either side of her head and repeated, “Really, you can tell me to stop.”

“You keep saying that, it makes me think you actually want me to tell you to stop.”

“No, doll. I want you. I have wanted you since I first saw you. But I also want you to be happy, to feel safe.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down to kiss her, hooking her knees up at his hips. He groaned, pressing his hardened cock against her, straining through his pants. He leaned down to kiss at her neck, biting at her pulse then running his tongue over the spot. Zelda busied herself with taking his pants off, unbuttoning them then using her feet to pull them down. 

He knew he should take his time with her, but he had wanted this already for so long, and they were both already breathless and excited. Running his hand down he checked between her legs and she was already so wet it drew a groan from him. Gently he ran a finger over her clit, and down into the wet slick, then back up again. She arched into his touch, already moaning out. Fuck, neither of them were going to last very long at this rate. He rubbed his fingers in circles around her clit until she was whimpering and grinding up against him. 

Finally he looked down at her and pressed another chaste kiss against her neck, her jaw, to her mouth. She looked up at him and whispered, “I’m ready.”

He just nodded and lined himself up, slowly easing into her. Fuck, she was tight. Maybe being a popsicle for 200 years does that to you. He had to ease in inch by inch and it took forever to get fully sheathed in her. He was watching her face, for grimaces or pain, but besides a few whimpers when he went deep inside there was no signs of discomfort. Slowly he pulled out, and thrusted back in. He tried to set a faster pace but she whimpered against him. “Slower, John. You’re hurting me.”

That pained him so he slowed down, reminded himself that she hasn’t been with a man in centuries. There was a dark part of him, when she said that, revved him up but he brushed that part away. That was for another time, when there was more trust. He thrusted slowly, using a rocking motion with his hips, making sure her clit was hit each time he thrusted in. Her arms were tight around his shoulders, legs wrapped tight around his waist. 

Usually he needed a hard and fast pace, but the way she was moaning and gasping underneath him had him close already. He was worried he was going to embarrass himself when her back suddenly arched, pressing her chest against him as she threw her head back. Hancock looked down at her just in time to feel it, she tightened around his cock in spasms as there was a rush of wetness. Picking up the pace only slightly, he kissed her as he found his own release, groaning while pumping erratically into her. 

Sweating and panting, they laid like that for a moment. Hancock was afraid to move, afraid if he pulled out it would be over and she would want him to leave. She leaned up and pressed a kiss to his cheek, to his ear (where his ear used to be) and leaned back again, smiling up at him. 

He propped himself up on an elbow. “Doll, I have been wanting to do that since I first saw you.”

Her face lit up. “Really?”

“Yeah, you have no fucking idea the effect you have on me. That you have on most men around you.” Hancock could feel his cum beginning to drip out of her, so he pulled out and laid down next to her. She got up to clean up, and came back to the bed with cigarettes and an ashtray. Hancock laid on his back and she laid with her head on his chest. Even if she just wanted this, just this one time, he would take it. 

Inside, Zelda was screaming for joy. He actually wanted it, and seemed like he enjoyed the sex. He was letting her cuddle him, lay on his chest like this. She had always wanted to lay like this with a man, and it was everything she would imagine it be. Felt fucking amazing, protected, and loved. Well maybe not loved, but she could pretend. He reached a hand around her and ran his fingertips up and down her back, pausing for a moment, then continuing. Zelda wondered what that was all about, but was already drifting off to sleep. Just before passing out, she looked up to ask him, “Can I ask you a favor, you can totally say no and I get it if-”

“Just fucking ask, Sunshine.”

“Can I be the little spoon? I have always wanted to be held like this, but I wanna try that, too. Especially to sleep.”

He tucked his chin to look down at her. “You ain’t never been held before?” She shook her head and he chuckled. “Turn over, doll. It’s been a while since I have had this, too.” 

Gleefully she turned on her other side and got really happy as he inched towards her. He put an arm over their heads, and the other arm went to wrap to pull her close but he froze. She looked back at him. “What’s wrong?”

“Sunshine, what happened to your back?” he said softly. 

Zelda remembered the large stripes of pink scar tissue that ran over her back. “Remember when I said that sometimes he used a belt?”

Hancock made a small noise in his throat, then wrapped the arm around her and pulled her tight, flush against him. He kissed her hair, humming gently as Zelda drifted off into sleep, a smile on her face.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hancock forces Zelda to see herself as he sees her. (This is something that happened with a man I dated after my ex husband. After all my body dysphoria regarding my size, he got sick of it and forced me to stand in front of him in a mirror as Hancock did here.) Hancock also realizes that this may be more than just a bit of fun. Zelda talks more about the vault and her (former) family. Also mentions of sexual assault. It isn't described, just mentioned in conversation.

Zelda couldn’t believe her luck, and how incredibly happy she was. They had slept together, and he didn’t sneak out in the middle of the night, instead waking up next to her. He didn’t rush off as she expected him to. In fact, they remained snuggled together even after they woke up. He was running his fingers through her hair, making her almost purr in response. She turned to face him, ignoring her own morning breath. He smiled at her, and drew his arm around her again to bring her close. She rested her head on his chest. They had said not a single word, but Zelda felt that they were both saying the same thing. 

And then her brain brought her back to reality. He was just being nice and polite, not wanting to duck out in the middle of the night. He isn’t into her like that. This was just sex and some affection, maybe women in this world aren’t super affectionate and he is starved for it. 

Suddenly, Hancock smacked her ass, pretty hard but not enough to leave a mark. She jumped and yelled, “What the fuck was that for?”

“I don’t know what is going on in your head but knock it off.”

“What are you talking about?” She asked innocently. “How do you know what is going on in my head?”

He leaned back to look at her. “At first you were all relaxed, practically purring and happy. Which made me happy. Then suddenly you froze and went rigid, probably because your brain said some dumb shit and you still let it get to you.”

“Well, maybe what my brain said isn’t so stupid and is probably true.”

“Yeah? Lay it on me. Tell me what you were thinking that made you go cold. Cause Sunshine, I liked how you were before, when you were so relaxed you just melted against me.” Hancock’s voice was stern, but his hand was cupping her face, thumb brushing her cheek.

Zelda blushed slightly. She wasn’t going to say anything but decided why not? This would be the moment of truth, he would tell her that she was right and her brain was correct, he may even apologize for calling it dumb. “The only reason you are still here is because you didn’t want to be rude and leave in the middle of the night.” Hancock’s thumb went still on her cheek. “This was just some fun, another conquest for you, another scratch on your bedpost.”

The smile was off Hancock’s face and Zelda knew she was right. He didn’t say anything for a moment, then “Zelda, what did I tell you last night? I do what I want. I don’t do shit for the sake of being polite or nice or whatever. I am here because I want to be. I stayed because I want to. I am lying here with you because I want to. Tell that voice in your head to fuck off, cause I ain’t going anywhere, unless you want me to.”

“I don’t want you to go anywhere,” Zelda admitted. 

Hancock put an arm around her waist and pulled her close. “Alright, then. How about a drink to start the day?”

Zelda giggled and got out of his grasp, walking over to the table that had a half empty bottle and a couple of glasses. Pouring them both a drink, Hancock reaching over to his red coat to take an inhaler of jet and a few hits. He held it out to her and she shook her head. “I am more of an upper girl in the morning.” She took a bottle of buffout from a bag and popped a pill, swallowing it down with the booze. 

She crawled back into bed with their substances, cigarettes, and an ashtray. They laid together half naked, drinking and smoking, letting the early morning pass slowly. She turned to him. “Do you have anything you need to do today?”

He shook his head. “Nah, nothing planned. Fahr knows where I am if something goes down.” He nuzzled her neck. “You got me all to yourself.”

Zelda giggled again, curling into his nuzzling. “What do you want to do, then?” She said between giggles.

“Mmm, I can think of a few things,” Hancock said, nibbling on her ear lobe. “If you want, we can go to the Rail for a few drinks. If you want we can hang out at my place. I got lots of chems and books. We can pop some mentats and discuss old Russian literature.” 

Zelda threw back her second drink, already delightfully tipsy. “Okay, let’s head over to your place, then.” Without thinking she got up, still naked. She was walking around the room for a minute while Hancock lounged and watched her, finishing his cigarette. She looked over at him and stepped back over to the bed, leaning over him with a mischievous look in her eye. He smirked at her and she leaned really close, face right in front of his, eyes looking into his deep and black ones, then snatched the cigarette out of his hand to take a drag. She gave it back to him and with a smile, stood back up and crossed the room to find clothes. 

She was looking through her pile. “Ugh, as always I have nothing to wear.”

“Sunshine, you are literally looking at a pile of clothing.”

“It isn’t that simple.” Frowning, she looked over at the full length mirror hanging on the wall, catching a glimpse of herself at a side profile. She sighed and hung her head. Hancock was watching her, and he came over to her as she tried to sniff away tears. 

“What’s wrong, Doll?”

“I just hate how I look. I am the fattest woman in the Commonwealth.”

“I mean yeah, you ain’t skin and bones like many of these people are, but you ain't as big as you think you are.” Hancock had his hands around her waist, standing behind her. 

She scoffed. “You are just being nice so I will fuck you.”

“Hey! Don’t talk like that, I am nice to you because I like you.” Still standing behind her, he turned them so that they stood in front of the mirror. Zelda hung her head, refusing to look at their reflection. “Look, Sunshine. I want you to look. I want you to see what I see.”

“What do you see?”

“I see a beautiful, curvy woman that for some reason is attracted to me even though she is way out of my league.” Hancock moved a hand from her waist and cupped her chin, forcing her to move her head up and eyes forward to look in the mirror. Her eyes met his in the mirror. He was smiling but she was on the verge of tears. His face softened but he forced her to keep watching. 

“I’m fucking huge,” she whined. 

Hancock stood up straight, both hands on her hips, holding her flush to him. “Look, Sunshine. Look in the mirror.” Her face was straight forward but her eyes were looking above. “Zelda, look.” Her eyes came down, looking at him in the mirror. “Don’t look at me, look at yourself.” With a wince, she looked at herself in the mirror, focusing on the soft and squishy skin of her stomach, the small pudge that stood out before the flab of her hips and thighs. “When you look at yourself in the mirror, and I am behind you, can you see me?”  
Zelda cocked her head. She could, she could see the edges of his body just beyond hers. “So, if you can see me past you, that means that your body is no wider than mine. Am I as huge?” She shook her head. Hancock’s hands dropped, fingertips running over her hips, trailing over the lines of her ass. “Yeah, you are wider here, but you are supposed to be. But you are not at your waist, your ribs, your shoulders. Everywhere else, you can see me behind you, so you are not as big as you think you are.” 

Zelda looked hard in the mirror. He was right. Realization was beginning to dawn on her. He was right, she could see past her own body and see his, which meant that most of her wasn’t bigger than him. Yes her hips were wider, but that is normal for a woman, right? They are supposed to be? At least they used to be, many women in this world were quite small from malnourishment. 

“There you go, now you see it.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and put his chin on her shoulder. “Finally got through to you. So why don’t you put that cute dress on that you wore yesterday, and we spend some time getting high and doing fun shit?” 

She smiled at his reflection in the mirror and nodded. He pecked a kiss against her neck and gave her waist a squeeze, before letting go to go get dressed himself. Zelda washed herself off with a rag and a can of purified water, and picked the dress up, shaking it off before lifting it up and over her head. She buttoned it up and gave herself another look in the mirror. She was seeing herself differently for the first time. She stood a little straighter, turned in the mirror to take a really good look. 

Hancock stood on the other side of the room, smiling at what he saw. Zelda was watching herself in the mirror, turning this way and that, looking up and down. She was standing a little straighter and her shoulders were set back. He sat on the edge of the bed and lit a cigarette, enjoying the fact that he finally got through to her. She is beautiful, maybe some confidence would finally help her perk up a bit more. She already has a great personality: funny, smart, snappy wit, and gorgeous. Maybe with some more confidence she would finally start to see it herself. 

He watched her pat her hair down, leaving it down but pinning half behind her ear. Part of him had wanted to growl when she was naked and he saw the scars on her back, but now was not the time for that. If he had said anything she would have run for cover. He wished her husband wasn’t dead so he could stab him, slowly. He remembered her saying she was a mother, and wondered where her child was. That could be a possible topic later, but he also didn’t want to bring up anything painful for her, and losing a child is the worst possible pain. At that point she turned to him with the brightest smile and his heart fluttered in his chest. 

“I’m pretty much ready, how about you?”

He shrugged on his red coat and put his tricorn on his head. “Just about, just need to put on my boots and we can go.” He put them on while Zelda gathered a few things in a small bag. He pretended to not notice that she brought a small change of clothes. Hell, she wanted to stay overnight, he wasn’t gonna stop her. “Alright, ready.” 

She practically skipped to the door. “Let’s go!” She strolled out of the room and Hancock thought about what a change she was from the young woman that stumbled, sad and suicidal, into his little town just a couple of days before. They walked down the short street to the State house, where he opened the door for her and followed her up the spiral staircase to the main room where he spent most of his time. It had comfortable furniture, including two large sofas that he was already thinking about fucking her on. Bending her over the desk in the corner. Up against the balcony railing. 

He took a deep breath to calm those feelings. He went to his desk and grabbed a bottle of bourbon and a tin of mentats. He took a seat on one couch in the middle as he usually did, knees spread wide. He was delighted to see that she didn’t sit on the adjacent couch, but sat next to him, turning to face him full on, hands in her lap. He chuckled and opened the tin of mentats and took one out, handing it to her. Instead, she opened her mouth expectantly. Fuck if that wasn’t a good look on her. He put it in her mouth, brushing his fingertips against her chin. He took two for himself, then leaned forward to pour them both a drink. 

They sat in silence for a while, letting the chems and booze have time to kick in, when Zelda spoke first. “I think I like this world better than the one I came from.”

“Yeah, Princess? Why is that?”

She just shrugged, looking down at the coffee table. “It’s just better here.” Hancock didn’t say anything, giving her time to go on by her own accord. “I can do whatever I want here. I’m not at the mercy of men, particularly my father or husband. I don’t need permission to do whatever I want. Yeah it is rough here but,” she smiled up at him, “I like it here.”

He put a hand on her though, giving it a squeeze. “I’m glad you do. I’m real happy you are here, too. You stumbling out of that vault was a good thing for me.”

Something dark flashed over her face. “You alright, Sunshine?”

She gave him a smile but it didn’t reach her eyes this time. “Of course!”

“Hey, don’t do that. Don’t shut me out like that. What’s wrong?” The mentats were kicking in with the booze finally, and Hancock felt that he might be able to push her a bit to get her to open up. 

“I feel guilty that I survived and no one else did.” 

“You talking about your family?” Hancock didn’t want to specify her child. 

She nodded. “Well, kinda. My husband was killed. My kid survived, as far as I am aware of. But I mean everyone in that vault, all of my neighbors in pods next to me. All of the other pods failed except mine.”

Hancock was confused and furrowed his brow. “What do you mean, your child survived? Where are they?”

“I don’t know, he was with my husband. Someone took him and killed my husband, then I was frozen again so I couldn’t do anything. I don’t even know how much time has passed since the incident.”

Hancock was staring at her. “So where is your kid?”

She threw her hands up in the air. “I don’t fucking know, okay? I don’t even know where to start! I got out of that vault, not knowing how much time has passed, who took him, to where, or anything! I wake up from that pod and as soon as I stumble out of the vault I am nearly killed and I have to kill people to live and then I was nearly raped in an alley near here and-”

Hancock went to stone. “You were nearly what now?”

“I told you when I first came here. I was assaulted and my clothes were mostly ripped off. What did you think that meant?”

She was right. He hadn’t thought that. “I’m sorry, I didn’t put that together before. You get a look at him? If he was close to here then he probably comes into town.”

Fear covered her face. “You think he will show up here?”

Hancock held onto her leg again. “He does, and you see him, you just tell me. Just point him out and I will take care of it. Good and slow.”

She nodded. “So anything with everything that happened I just… There is nothing I can do about it now, you know? And maybe that makes me a shit mom.”

He gave her leg a squeeze where his hand was. “Nah, you ain’t a shit mom. Lots of moms here do worse shit than that and they aren’t even the worst. This world is about survival, and you made the right choice.”  
She was finishing the booze in her glass and he poured her another. At least she could hold her liquor. For the most part. He thought of the night they got blitzed and carried each other up the stairs, the night she kissed him and he smiled. His thoughts were interrupted when she cleared her throat. “I wasn’t even really, you know, bonded with him all that much.”

“What you mean?”

“I mean I loved him of course, as a mother is supposed to love her child and I didn’t wish harm on him but like, there was always this disconnect. Well, he was only a few months old so it wasn’t for very long but. He wasn’t uh, conceived in the best of situations.”

Hancock just watched her face, waiting for her to go on. Her cheeks were flushed slightly. When she didn’t go on, he asked. “What do you mean?”

“Remember how I said that me and my husband didn’t like each other but we had to get married? Even dating that man was shit after a while. Being married to him was worse. He made me have, you know, relations with him.”

“So he raped you?”

She scoffed. “It isn’t rape when you are married to someone.”

“Did you say no, that you didn’t want to?”

“Yes.”

“And did he fuck you anyway?”

“Yes.”

“That’s rape.”

She shook her head. “It doesn’t count when you are married. Marriage is different.”

Hancock almost laughed. Almost. “Man, you pre-wars are fucking weird about sex. Met lots of pre-war ghouls. All of them have weird ass notions about sex. And rape. If you said no and he did it anyway, that’s rape. Hell, a lot of pre war ghouls who are women talk about never having had an orgasm before, and have never masturbated. Fucking weird, right?”

Zelda fidgeted in her seat. “Yeah, weird.”

Hancock looked at her and his jaw dropped. “Don’t tell me…”

“I mean, I masturbated a few times as a teen but I felt weird about it after, like ashamed.”  
“What about during sex? Had you ever…?” He let his voice trail off. 

She played with the hem of her skirt and couldn’t meet his eyes. “Yesterday was the first time that happened.”

He had no idea what to say. “You fucking with me?”

“I mean come on, I told you last night that I had never cuddled or been held before, and I was a married woman. Is it so far off to say that you gave me my first orgasms from sex?”

She had a point there. “I guess not. So I popped your orgasm cherry?” He laughed at her blush. “Come on, don’t get shy on me now.”

Zelda just inched over on the couch, her side flushed to his. He put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer. “Yeah, Sunshine, I can see how you like it better here than there.” Her face was suddenly shy and she wouldn’t meet his eyes as the corners of her mouth turned up slightly. He took hold of her chin with the arm that wasn’t wrapped around her, and forced her face up to catch her lips in a kiss. 

She leaned forward into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I like it much better here.” She crawled into his lap, straddling him, pulling a slight groan as her crotch rubbed against his cock, beginning to harden. Hands behind his head, she pulled him in for a kiss, lightly grinding her hips. Hancock was lost in the moment with her, until the neighborhood watch could be heard talking right beside the open doorway and she froze in his lap. 

He held onto her hips and smiled. “It’s okay, Doll. They don’t mind.” He leaned in for another kiss but she put her hand up. 

“They may not mind, but I do. Not into being watched.”

He leaned back, taking a good look at the hard and stubborn look on her face. She was already coming into her own. “Alright, you got it. Wanna go somewhere more private?” She nodded eagerly. “Wrap your legs tight around my waist.”

“Why? You can’t carry me, I’m too big-”

“Just do it.”

She wrapped her legs around his waist and in a fluid movement stood up, and walked across the room to the area that was his private bedroom, with a door that could be closed. Zelda was laughing playfully in his arms as he carried her. Moving into the room and closing the door behind him with his foot, he set her down on the bed and she let her legs go from his waist. She was still laughing, breathless. “I can’t believe you were able to do that!”

Standing in front of her, he leaned forward to press kisses along her throat. “Why not?”

She looked at him incredulously. “While I am not the huge whale I thought I was, you are very lean and wiry.”

Hancock pressed more kisses down her throat, to her collarbone, pushing the neckline of her dress out of the way. “Being a ghoul has its perks, besides immortality. Increased strength is one of them.” 

“Oh. Wait, immortality? So you can’t die?”

“I should be more specific. I can die, it’s just that it won’t be of old age. I will either be killed by someone, or turn feral in which I will be killed by someone.”

“So you can live forever if you are careful.”

“Yeah, but I’m not very careful. Now, enough of this yapping. I got other ideas for my mouth.”

“Oh. Like what?” Fuck, Hancock liked that random bashful innocence that popped up in her face sometimes. Kneeling down on the floor by the edge of the bed, he was the perfect height. He grabbed her by the back of the knees, and yanked her forward so that she was sitting almost half off the bed. He looked up at her and smirked, lifting the hem of her dress up and past her waist. The moment of realization on her face was fucking sexy, when she realized what he meant to do. “I’ve never uh, had this done before.”

“I’m not surprised. If your husband never even held you, I doubt he ate your pussy out.” He chuckled at her blush to his crass language, then pushed her knees apart. Pressing his thumb over where her clit was in her underwear, he smiled at the soft gasp. She was still sitting up, looking down at him, chewing on her bottom lip. He maintained eye contact as he grasped the band of her panties and pulled them down and off of her, leaving her bare to him under that cute dress. 

He ran his hands up her thighs, close to the prize, and gently pushed them open. Leaning forward again, he did a long lick right up her slit from her entrance to her clit, tongue dipping in all the folds there. Immediately she threw herself back, laying flat on the bed as her back arched and knees lifted. Hancock held her hips down with his forearms as he used his fingers to keep her open. A whimper escaped her lips as his tongue did circles around her clit, not wanting to stimulate her too much at once. 

He experimented with a direct touch on her clit and she tried to move away from him with a small cry. Reading her body language, he pressed his tongue to the spot just above her clit, hidden by her hood that he pulled back. This time a moan came from her and her hips moved towards him in a gentle jerk. He continued to press to that spot, running the tip of his tongue in tiny circles in the spot as her moans got louder. “Fuck, John.” His first name from her lips made a groan escape from his. He moved his tongue down, pressing against her inner lips and down to her entrance, teasing it in circles. Her hips were moving against his arms holding them down as he ran his tongue back up, dipping here and there in each fold. When he hit that spot above her clit again she cried out, and he pressed his lips against her clit and sucked gently. Bringing an arm down, he pushed a finger inside of her wet cunt with no resistance, and found the rough spot inside that he ran a finger over. Immediately she clamped down all around him, and she screamed out his name as she climaxed on his face. 

Pressing a sweet kiss to her lower lips and pulling his finger from her, he stood up and finished removing his clothes then leaned over her, chuckling at the sated look on her face. Her heavy lidded eyes were barely open and she had a flush to her skin on her face and chest. He pressed kisses to her soft stomach, ignoring her when she tried to move away from him doing that. He paid special attention to the lines of stretch marks there, running his tongue up each, then moving up to her breasts, teeth gently pulling on each nipple. 

Putting a knee up on the bed and crawling over her, he got up to her face and cupped her cheek. Her eyes fully opened and looked up at him. For a moment she seemed unsure, confused, then her face softened. He pressed a kiss to her lips, sweet and gentle, and she immediately deepened it as she ran her tongue over his lips and into his moved. Groaning, he sat on both of his knees between her legs. Grabbing one of her thighs to hitch her leg over his waist, she immediately brought her other leg up on his other side. 

He lined himself up at her entrance and watched her face as he slowly pressed in, his cock stretching her walls around him. Immediately her eyes closed and her head went back, arms reaching up to grab his biceps. Once he was fully seated in her he held still and felt her walls tighten and grip around him. He slowly pulled out a bit and pushed back in harder, and her nails dug into his arms as her soft gasps filled his ears. 

He began slowly again, slowly pulling out half way and thrusting in harder, a slow and deep pace. When her gasps turned to moans, he quickened his pace. Not going nearly as fast and hard as he wanted, but remembered the night before where she had asked him to slow down. Out of nowhere, she said, “John, harder. I want you to fuck me.” Then she snapped her mouth shut and looked embarrassed. 

He pressed a kiss to her jaw. “You feel fucking amazing, Zelda.” And he leaned back so he was sitting on his knees, grasping her hips with his hands. He increased his pace slowly, increasing until he reached a punishing pace. Her moans were loud at this point and he knew everyone in the building could hear her but he didn’t care. She was crying out his name as he fucked her and he was reaching his own finishing point entirely too fast. 

“I need you to come for me, Zelda.” He brought a hand over to press a finger to that spot above her clit that she liked so much, and as soon as his finger hit the spot he felt her walls tighten around him and a rush of her wetness go over him. That brought him to his own orgasm, and he buried himself in her as he moaned out, throwing his head back. He was almost out of breath, gasping for air as he sat above her. She wasn’t looking at him, her own deep breaths saying she felt the same way. 

Leaning over her again, he kissed her lips and smiled at her. “Fucking perfect you are, Sunshine.”

She giggled. “You probably tell all the girls you fuck that.”

For some reason that hurt, a stabbing pang in his heart. He cupped her cheek as he looked down at her. “Do you think that this is anything like what I do with anyone else?” She just shrugged. “Look at me, open your eyes. Better. Yeah, I ain’t no saint. I have slept around. But you are the first person I have held, have slept in a bed with, in years. All those other women, I don’t kiss them like I do you.” 

Her face said she didn’t believe him. “You have quite the silver tongue.”

“You already knew that, seeing as I used that tongue to make you come.” Her blush turned bright red, which almost made him laugh but he held back. She needed to understand. “I don’t fuck other women like I fuck you, because you and I both know this is more than fucking.”

He sat up, and laid down fully on the bed and pulled her towards him. She immediately rested her head against the scarred and burned skin of his chest, sighing happily. He had a feeling she still didn’t believe him, still felt that he was just using her for some romps in the sack. He ran his fingers over the pink welts and scars on her back as he looked up at the ceiling, just enjoying the moment of her curled against him. Fuck, he wanted her to himself, but had no idea how to tell her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelda is scared of feelings, as usual. Hancock fights with her after she chooses to do a dangerous and foolish mission

Zelda awoke early the next morning after spending the day and night before tossing in the sheets with Hancock. Her mind was still dark, telling her that her insecurities were right. He was sound asleep next to her, and she snuck out of bed and got dressed without waking him, sneaking out of the State house. 

Goodneighbor was quiet in the early morning, the light of the sun barely peeking over the horizon. She went to Daisy’s shop and was delighted to find the woman up and at her table. “Do you ever sleep?” Zelda joked. 

Daisy laughed. “Not too much, being a ghoul has its perks. I like to open early, catch the early risers such as yourself. What can I do for you?”

Zelda shifted on her feet. “I’m not sure. I don’t know what to do. Can I buy a coffee from you?”

Daisy got up and made her a cup, pushing away Zelda’s caps. “Don’t worry about it.”

“You have been real nice to me, I feel like a mooch. Do you have any work that needs to be done?”

Daisy chuckled. “Not unless you want to brave the library and deal with some super mutants for me.”

Zelda perked up. “The library still exists?”

“Barely. Lots of books still, but the place is overrun with super mutants. It makes me so sad. I have some books I have wanted to return for centuries, and it hurts my heart that such a place is being defiled by those monsters.”

Zelda threw back her coffee. “I will take care of it.”

“No, you shouldn’t. Super mutants are not something to mess with, especially alone. I don’t want you getting hurt, Hancock will string me up.”

“I am going to do it no matter what, Hancock won’t care. Come on, let me do this one thing for you? You have been so good to me.”

Daisy sighed. “If you go, it is of your own volition. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Zelda smiled and said goodbye, running back to her room at the Rexford. She put on her armor and checked her weapons, emptying her pack of anything she didn’t need. She threw a few stimpacks and chems just in case and booked it out of Goodneighbor before the sun was fully up with a smile on her face. The library was still up and there were still books there. Her heart was beating with excitement as she ran down the road, Daisy’s books to return in her pack. 

Hancock groaned as he woke up, the sun high in the midmorning, glowing through the window of his room. He reached beside him and found the bed empty other than him. He sighed, of course she took off before he woke. Fuck, he would need to go find her. Getting up, he took a hit of jet as he pulled his clothes on, walking around his office and looking at paperwork on his desk. Nothing too important yet, he could go find Zelda first then do his mayoral duties. 

Strolling through his town, he said hello to people goodnaturedly. Even though she ducked out on him, he had fully enjoyed the time spent with her and he wanted more. He needed to make her understand that he wanted her around him, at his side. So quickly it came to him, but his instinct was screaming at him to keep her at his side and he followed his instinct. Climbing the stairs, he went to her room. The door unlocked, he chuckled at her forgetfulness of these things. Inside was empty. A few of her things were there but she was not. Her armor, weapons, and pack were gone but her clothes were there. 

Alright, now might be the time to start worrying. He didn’t know where she could go, she didn’t tell him about a job coming up. He asked around, no one had really seen her leave. His panic started to rise more. Where the fuck could she have gone? And not tell him, not leave a note? What the fuck?

He went to Daisy, he knew Zelda really liked her. Daisy looked nervous as he came into the shop. Not a good sign. “Hey there, Daisy. You seen Zelda?”

“Yes, early this morning, just before sunrise.”

Hancock waited for her to go on but she didn’t. He tapped his fingers on her counter. “And?”

Daisy put her hands on her face. “I told her not to do it, I swear I tried to talk her out of it.”

Hancock’s heart started pounding in his chest. “And what is that?”

“She went to the library. I let it slip that it still existed and is overrun by super mutants, and how it brought me down that it was defiled by those monsters. She had it in her head that she needed to go for me, even when I begged her not to.”

“She went to the fucking library?” Hancock was growling, and Daisy just gulped, nodding her head. “Even when she knew of the danger?” Daisy nodded again. “Fuck!”

He had no idea what to do. Did he send men after her? It was fucking dangerous, he couldn’t risk the lives of his guards for this. He would need to go himself, but he needed to check in with Fahr first. Running back to the State house, he found her sitting in his office, looking at paperwork on his desk. 

“Hey, Hancock. How’s it going?”

“Anything going on today?”

She shook her head. “Nah, few caravan contracts to sign, town has been real quiet with No Nose gone. Just the usual stuff that the guards been taking care of. You okay?”

“Zelda took off to the library on some fucking quest to help Daisy even when she was warned of the danger.” He was already packing stimpacks in his pockets and getting his rifle setup. 

“Shit, man. Yeah, everything is good on the homefront. You going after her? Place is fucking dangerous.”

“Yeah I fucking know it but I am not going to sit here twiddling my fucking thumbs waiting for her to come back if she even does.”

“Alright. Please be safe, I know you got your head wrapped up in this chick but we need you here, Hancock.”

“I know, promise I won’t do anything too stupid.”

“You are already doing stupid shit, Hancock.”

“I wouldn’t be where I am today if I made good decisions. I’ll be back later, Fahr.” At that, he left the State house and out of the gates of Goodneighbor, heading down the alleys to the library, getting more and more angry as he went. 

Zelda sat behind a desk in an office to catch her breath. Daisy wasn’t kidding when she said overrun with super mutants. After coming in and taking out the robots, she had heard them screaming at her from upstairs. She had explosives and had been able to clear the first floor but the second floor was proving to be a challenge. She had several cuts and a burn on her arm from a laser. She was trying to catch her breath, and put a stimpack in the burn on her arm. How many fucking more could there be? She heard them talking down the hall to each other, saying they couldn’t find her. Good, some time to catch her breath. Most of the books would be on this floor and down in the basement. She had already been able to fill her pack with some and returned Daisy’s books. 

She was happy with how it went so far, Daisy would be pleased. She knew that she wouldn’t be able to clear the whole place but taking out some of the monsters would be some kind of help. Having caught her breath and the pain easing up slightly, she picked herself up and put her pack back on, getting her gun ready. Slowly she stepped to the doorway and peaked out. She didn’t see anyone but heard the monsters down the hall on the left. 

She krept out, dodging behind trash cans. Getting a clear shot from two of them standing down the hall like the idiots they were in plain sight, she picked up her rifle and took two shots, taking them out. With her position now made clear to them, two more came running down the hall at her, one with a sledgehammer. She took one out as the monster with the sledgehammer ran at her, swinging it wildly. She ducked down, but it still hit her in the shoulder, instant pain making her cry out. 

Out of nowhere she heard a loud yell and gunshots and the super mutant in front of her dropped his sledgehammer, falling down. Suddenly Hancock came into view and he ran up, putting another shot in the monster’s head. She didn’t know what to say, just gawked at him. He looked at her and he looked fucking pissed. He grabbed her arm, the one with the injured shoulder and she cried out. He growled again and took her other arm, pulling her out of the library. 

Surprised, she followed him. She didn’t want to, she wanted to finish what she came here for but his hand on her was strong and wouldn’t let go no matter how much she pulled back. He opened the door out of the library and practically threw her out, slamming it shut behind them. “What the fuck, Hancock?”

“What the fuck is right. You have pissed me off to no end and I recommend that you take it down a notch right now.”

“Take it down a notch? Why don’t you mind your own fucking business?” Her adrenaline was pumping from the fight, and her mouth had a mind of its own. 

“My fucking business? You are my fucking business, the moment you came into town and I spent the night with you. What the fuck are you fucking doing, huh? You were warned how dangerous this place was.” He was standing over arm’s length from her and she could see his heavy breathing as his chest rose and fell. 

“I am not your fucking business. Just because I let you fuck me doesn’t mean shit, Hancock. Leave me alone.” She began storming off back to Goodneighbor and to her dismay, he followed her, staying right behind her. She went right to her room at the hotel to unpack and treat her shoulder. She expected Hancock to go back to his place at the State house but to her dismay again, he followed her. 

She stepped into her room and he slammed the door, locking it behind him. “I am not going to be talked to like this,” he growled. 

“Then leave.” She took her pack off and got her chems and stimpack out. 

“No. You are not acting like yourself, what is going on?”

“Nothing.” She blinked to keep the tears away, her shaking hands trying to dose out of med-x. He just watched her for a moment and then sighed, stepping to her and taking the syringe, putting it in her arm. “I’m fine.”

“You are shaking like a leaf, trying to not cry as you fucking yell at me. You are far from fine. What’s going on?” His fingers, gentle and nimble, grabbed the bottom of her shirt to pull it off. She didn’t argue, the chems flowing through her system. When he tried to get her arm out of the shirt she cried out again. He moved around it, pulling the shirt off over her arm. “Let me see.”

“It’s fine.”

“You say it’s fine one more time and I am fucking leaving.”

They stared at each other a moment and she hardened her face to him. “It’s fine.”

His hand came up and she thought he would slap her so she flinched. Instead it grasped the back of her neck, holding her still. “Stop it.” She stared hard at him, and his face was furrowed with worry and fear, along with the anger. She didn’t want to back down but the adrenaline was starting to wear off and she was crashing from it. 

She hung her head and relaxed her body. “Sorry.”

His hand at her neck gripped tighter and he shook her gently. “Look at me.” She moved her eyes back up to his face. “You have any idea what you just put me through?” She shook her head. No, not really. Why would it even matter? “I wake up and you are gone. I can’t find you. I find out from someone else that you went somewhere dangerous that it was likely you wouldn’t make it back from.”

“So?”

“So? Fucking so? I am supposed to be okay with that?”

She shrugged. “I know you have a thing for helping people, and I know you don’t like it when people get hurt, but I really don’t understand why this matters so much to you.”

His hand dropped from her neck. “You really think that, don’t you?”

She shrugged with her good shoulder and he sighed, picking up a stimpack and stabbing it where the hammer hit her. She hissed as the needle injected into her. His fingers traced the swollen shoulder, thumb brushing the giant bruise forming. “I don’t like you getting hurt.”

“Shit happens.”

“It doesn’t have to happen.”

She put her shirt back on. She had no idea what his game was, and she didn’t like it. She knew how men were, what they wanted. He was hard to figure out. He got what he wanted, they had fun, why was he playing these games with her? She turned her back to walk away and he grabbed her elbow, bringing her back to him. “Don’t walk away from me when we are talking.”

“We aren’t really talking, I have nothing more to say to you.”

“What the fuck is going on in that head of yours?”

“Why does it matter to you?”

“Fuck if I know. I have no idea why you matter so much to me. From the first moment I fucking saw you, I was in head first. I have no idea why. Everything about you, I like. How you look, your mind, your heart. Everything. I’m not playing games with you, I am not joking around and trying to hurt you.”

The words sounded nice and all, but the likelihood of it being true? What happens once the novelty wears off and he gets bored? She would be out another fucking thing. So, what? Hang around until he gets bored? Spend the time setting up her own life? 

“What are you thinking about?” His voice cut through her thoughts, his hands at her waist. She hadn’t noticed that he was touching her, fingertips gripping at her hips. 

“Hmm? Nothing.”

“I don’t like being lied to.”

“Hancock, we fucked. That’s it. It was fun, we had fun, but don’t try to fool me into thinking that you want anything more than just a hole to shove your cock in.”

“Is that what you want?” His voice was low, deep. He sounded pissed, more pissed off than he was. She just rolled her eyes, and he growled at that. 

Hancock was fucking pissed. The fear was subsiding, and the anger was coming from frustration. Her brain was so fucked that she couldn’t wrap her mind around him just wanting her. Fuck, that’s all he wanted. Her. Did she just want to be used? Some chicks were into that. When she rolled her eyes at him, that set him off and his anger bubbled over. 

With a growl, his hands at her waist gripped tighter, lifting her onto the table right behind her. His mouth crashed down on hers, tongue darting in her mouth and biting her bottom lip as he worked on pulling her shorts off. His tongue went down her throat, tracing her pulse as her head was thrown back, gasps escaping her lips. Fuck, he wanted her to push him off but she didn’t. 

He grabbed hold of her thighs, those fucking thighs, nails digging in and he got pleasure from the yelp that came from her lips. With a jerk he yanked them around his waist, wrapping them around him as his hand went to undoing his pants, yanking his cock out. He was already fucking hard for her, was as soon as his hands went on her, and with one arm he wrapped around her shoulders to pull her to him while the other hand he rubbed the head of his cock against her slit. 

She was wet, not as wet as he would like her to be but wet enough to not hurt her. He hesitated, waited to see if she would push him away, but she didn’t. Hand on the table behind her and a hand on his cock, he shoved himself in her all the way. She cried out, flinching away, but her legs wrapped around his waist. He didn’t go slow this time, didn’t ease into a fast pace. Immediately he set to fucking her as hard as he could, as fast as he could. 

She leaned back on her arm on the table, head thrown back and her mouth in a silent moan. Her eyes closed tight, her face showed more pain than pleasure but fuck if Hancock cared right now. He was fucking pissed. She nearly died, and refused to even listen to him. She had no idea, refused to even try to understand how he felt, what he wanted. She wasn’t making many noises and Hancock was beginning to think this had been a bad idea. 

“Fuck, John.” It came out as a breath, and she threw her arms around his neck, holding herself tight to him, her legs tighter around his waist. With her wrapped around him like that, he leaned back on the table on his hands for balance as he kept going, pounding into her with no abandon. Her face turned and her lips met his, a kiss too sweet for how he was fucking her. How she had wrapped herself around him, how she was kissing him, it all went straight to his fucking heart. He felt her begin to tighten just before she moaned into his ear, “John, I’m gonna come.”

Hancock groaned out, turning his head to meet her lips again. Grunting with the effort and his own end coming soon as well, against her lips he moaned, “Come for me. I want to feel it.” A moment later her cunt tightened around him, spasming against him and her legs wrapped tighter around his waist. He wrapped an arm around her waist to hold her to him as his thrusts became erratic, filling her with his own orgasm. 

Both out of breath, they stayed wrapped like that for a few minutes. Hancock buried his face in her neck, catching his breath and feeling her breath on his shoulder. He went to move away, to put his now soft cock back in his pants, and she clung on tighter. “Just a minute longer.”

That made him chuckle. “Sunshine, I’m not going anywhere.” She pressed her forehead against his shoulder and he turned his face to her. “What’s wrong? Why are you doing this?”

She shrugged against him. “I don’t know. Every fiber in my being is telling me to run. To get away. Leave all of this.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t deserve this. Because I am a novelty. When the novelty wears off and you see that I am just a normal, boring woman, you will move on and I will be back at square one.”

Hancock leaned back and cupped her face in his hands. “I am going to make this clear to you. Yes, I like to have fun and I have fucked around. Anyone I fuck, I am honest with. I tell them this is a one time thing, just for a night. I don’t play games and I don’t want anyone hurt in the process. From the beginning, I have wanted more than that from you. I don’t know why. My gut is screaming at me to keep you by my side. If this was just a novelty, a fun fuck with a random vault dweller, I would tell you. I would not play with your head. I am not your ex husband.”

She nodded against his hand. “I’m really tired.”

“Let’s get some rest then, huh?” He kissed her forehead and she leaned back so they could get up and clean off. They fell into the bed together, taking hits of jet until they both passed out. 

Zelda woke again before the sun came up. Hancock was snoring softly beside her, an arm around her waist. She was used to getting out of bed quietly, without moving someone, to keep Nate from waking. Quickly and quietly, she packed up all of her things in her pack and left before she could change her mind. 

She was developing feelings for the man, and why? They hung out a few times, they fucked a few times. They sat around doing drugs and reading books together, they stayed up talking all night when she stayed at the State house. A man pays attention to her and is nice so she begins to fall for him? Fucking pathetic. Quietly she headed downstairs of the hotel and saw that chem dealer, Fred in a chair. “Hey, Fred.”

“Well if it isn’t the town’s favorite vault dweller. What can I do for you?” He smiled warmly at her even if his hands shook. 

“Do you have any med-x?”

“Nah, sweetheart. Sold it all to Daisy, she sells it with the stimpacks. Can go get some from her.”

“Thanks, Fred.” With a wave, she left the hotel and went to Daisy. She found the woman at the counter as usual, nose in a book. “Heya Daisy, I brought you some books from the library.”

“Well if that isn’t the best gift I have ever gotten. Thanks, doll. Do you need anything? Cup of coffee?”

Zelda smiled, she would need to appear as if all was normal. “Sure, I can take a quick cup.” She sat with the woman at a table in the shop, drinking coffee and smoking a cigarette. “Say, Daisy. You have any med-x I can buy?”

“Well of course! You injured?”

“Yeah, took a hit in the shoulder yesterday. I have a job I have to do and wanted to take enough with me to make it last.”

“Sure. How much you need?” Daisy brought out the box of full syringes. 

Zelda took out her bag of caps, counting. “I have enough for twelve syringes. I’ll take that.”

Daisy looked at her for a moment. “That’s a lot of med-x.”

Zelda just sighed and waved her hand. “I know, I have a bit of a tolerance for it thanks to my partying days before the bombs. And I am in a lot of pain and this job is going to take a while. Want to make sure I don’t run out. Better safe than sorry, right?”

Daisy nodded. “That makes sense. Here you go, love. Do you need anything else?”

Zelda pretended to shuffled around in her pack. “Nope, I got plenty of stimpacks left from the job yesterday, good on ammo. Thanks, Daisy.” And with that she left the gates of Goodneighbor. As soon as the door closed behind her, she let out a sobbing breath. She turned right, and headed for the only home she ever knew, Sanctuary.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hancock tries to find Zelda, as Zelda deals with her past. Some self harm mentioned in this chapter and past domestic violence.

Hancock woke with the sun peeking into his face and he reached for Zelda to find the bed empty, again. He sighed, she left her own room this time. He got up, wiping the sleep from his eyes and looked around the room to feel immediate panic. All of her things were gone. Fuck. He ran downstairs, hoping he could find her somewhere, anywhere. Where could she have run off to? She didn’t have anywhere to go, she didn’t have anyone but him. 

He went straight to Daisy this time. “Hey, Hancock. How’s your morning?”

He skipped the small talk. “You seen Zelda?”

“Yeah, came by this morning for supplies before her job.”

“Job?”

“Yup, said she had a job that would take a while and was injured. Bought out all of my med-x.”

Hancock’s blood ran cold. His face must have shown his panic because Daisy immediately clapped her hands to her mouth. “Do you know where she could have gone? Anywhere she could go?”

Daisy shook her head. “Everything she knew is gone, and she knows that. Shit, Hancock. Are you going to try to find her?”

“I don’t even know where to look for her.”

Daisy tapped her fingers on the counter, thinking. “She has to be somewhere.”

“Her buying off your med-x worries me. Why the fuck you let her buy it all?”

“She seemed fine, seemed chipper. She said she was injured and had a long job, she didn’t seem down or depressed or I wouldn’t have.”

“She is good at putting on a face. Fuck. Okay, I am going to my office, I need to try to figure this out.” Hancock ran into his office in the State house, sitting behind his desk. Taking hits of jet, he went over paperwork for caravans and traders to try to distract himself but his mind went back to her. 

What if she was somewhere, alone, overdosing? Fuck, he didn’t want to think of that. He spent most of the day taking entirely too many chems. He started popping mentats hoping that it would give him an edge in finding her. By the time evening came, he was fucking sick and his whole body felt like it was covered in needles as he tried to be normal as a mayor. 

He didn’t hear the man come in, not up the stairs or through the door. Suddenly, a man in sunglasses and way to bright a smile for his own mood sat in the chair across from him. “Can I help you?”

“Might be able to help each other. You got a geiger counter?”

Hancock sighed. The fucking Railroad. “What do you need? Institute shit going on or something?”

The man chuckled. “Something like that. Some serious shit is going down and I need a certain someone to help me out. And you need to find that someone. I like you, Hancock. I like you a lot. So I thought I would come give you some information that you sorely need. Name’s Deacon, by the way.”

“Deacon, I am not in the mood for riddles and puzzles. I know your organization likes being obtuse but I am not in the mood. Out with it.”

“Zelda is key in taking down the Institute, and I know where she probably is.”

Hancock froze. “Where is she?”

“I said probably, now. She probably went home. Sanctuary. Former suburbs, where she lived with her husband and child. The husband who was killed and her child who was kidnapped. The Institute was involved, and they are likely to come for her.”

“Why are you telling me all of this? This feels like secret information.”

“It is but I just made an executive decision. I am going to find her and tell her, and she is likely to tell you so why not just cut out the middle man. Or woman. You get it.”

Hancock was already packing his things to go. “Alright, let’s go find her.”

“Fuck yeah, let’s do it.”

Zelda was sitting in the shell of a house that used to be her home. Her prison. The perfect suburban home, with the nice furniture and television, the robot butler and the pristine lawn. She sat on the ripped couch in the living room, propping her feet up on the coffee table. She heard Nate in her mind telling her to get her fucking feet off the table. She smirked. Fuck off, Nate. She winced, as she thought about how he would have slapped her when she said that. She went through her pack and found the bottle of whiskey, and the pack of cigarettes. She turned her pipboy to Diamond City Radio and sang along to the seven same fucking songs that played. The more drunk she got, the more exhausted she was. Then, that Skeeter Davis song came on. The sad one about the end of the world. Sitting back with her head on the back of the couch and arms open, she stared at the ceiling. 

How fucking fitting. It was the end of the world. Before the bombs, she was part of revolutionaries that warned people about the tyranny and facsism of their government, but no one listened. They tried to take part in demonstrations but the power was too strong to fight. And then the bombs came. The bombs she had warned everyone that would happen. The bombs that killed anyone that wasn’t rich enough to buy a spot in a vault. And now they were all gone. Some unlucky souls turned to ghouls or super mutants. The lucky ones died. 

The song ended and Travis’ annoying ass voice came on, stuttering like an idiot. She turned off the radio and grabbed the bottle, walking around the house. She ignored the nursery and walked into her former bedroom with her husband. Most of the furniture was destroyed but the bed was there. That goddamn fucking bed. She stared at it for a moment then flipped it off, bringing the bottle to her mouth again. She sat on the edge of it and sighed. So many memories in this room, and none of them good. 

She stared at the closet door, just like she used to before the bombs. Curious, she got up and opened the door and looked down and gasped. There, on the floor, was her record player and a box of records. It was a style she had found that could be powered by hand cranking so she could hide it. All of her music had been deemed illegal and most of the records were burned, all said to be unfit by civilized people. Music by artists who spoke the truth. 

Setting the bottle down, she hurriedly cranked the handle for a few minutes and it kicked on. Excited, she found a record and put it on. The only music that had survived this world were old blues and jazz, not a lot of rock existed and certainly not punk. Her fingers shaking, she put the Pennywise record on, and her heart jumped as “Fuck Authority” came blasting through the speakers. Too drunk to care how loud it was, she sang along to the lyrics, smiling at the memory of how much Nate hated this shit. 

Lighting a cigarette, she sang along. “Fuck authority, silent majority. Raised by the system, now it’s time to rise against. Sick of your treason, sick of your lies. Fuck no we won’t listen, gonna open your eyes!” Eyes closed she screamed out, “Frustration! Domination!” hands pounding on the floor as she rocked out, taking swigs from the bottle in her hand. She let herself get lost in the music, ignoring the destroyed world around her, just as she used to do when Nate was at work. 

Hancock and Deacon had been practically running, trying tog et the to housing area. They knew it was close to where the vault was. When the houses came into view, Hancock’s adrenaline started pumping. What would he find? Would she be passed out, unconscious, or worse? He gulped, then Deacon stopped suddenly just as they crossed a bridge, putting his hand out to stop Hancock. “Hear that?” he said. 

Hancock strained his ears. Just far in, from one of the houses, was… some kind of music? They took off running towards it, following the heavy guitar and drum sounds until they got to a house that was still standing but falling apart. The music was louder, had to be from there. They were inside and Hancock saw her coat on the couch and breathed a sigh of relief. She was here. Deacon took a seat on the couch and waved Hancock towards the bedroom where the music was coming from. 

Slowly he stepped down the hall, finding her in what looked to be a bedroom. Sitting on the floor by the bed, booze in one hand and cigarette in the other, eyes closed as she bobbed her head to the music. It was heavy music, loud and screaming. Different from anything he ever heard. He just watched her. She looked to be in her element. Angry and pissed off at the world. He smiled and leaned against the doorway as she sang along to the music, as the singer from the band was saying over and over “fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me”. That made him laugh and she jumped, face frozen in fear at seeing him. That made his stomach go in his throat. As soon as he saw it, she wiped her face clean and turned from him, looking at the wall. 

The music stopped and the record was at an end. He sat on the edge of the bed by her. He was relieved that she was still alive, still here. “Hey Sunshine. You didn’t say goodbye.”

She shrugged and took another drink from the bottle. “Doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me. You matter to me.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“I want to know you.”

At that, she sighed, leaning back and resting her head on the bed with her eyes closed. Her head was close to his leg. She looked fucking tired. He brushed her hair out of her face. “Hancock, it’s all gone. They are all gone.”

“I know, Sunshine.”

“No, you don’t. You didn’t know them.” Tears started running down her face. She got up from where she was sitting on the floor and sat next to him on the bed. “I was a revolutionary. We fought the powers. We warned people that this-” she gestured around her- “would happen. No one listened. I was arrested, beaten, hurt. These people, the people in power, people like my ex husband, were full of hate. They hated anyone not white. They hated anyone that loved someone of the same gender. They were bigoted assholes, and they did this. They killed everyone. Anyone that wasn’t rich and able to get in a vault, died that day. All my friends, the people I made molotov cocktails with and went to underground concerts, all died. I lived because I had to marry this piece of shit. The unlucky ones got turned to ghouls and super mutants. Everything I was, everything about me, died the day I said my vows to a man that did nothing but hurt me. And they are all gone.”

Hancock didn’t know what to say. He just watched her. When a sob racked her body, he took her in his arms. “Sunshine, I know you feel guilty. Being a survivor comes with a lot of guilt. Believe me, I know. It sucks, and there isn’t much I can say or do to make you feel better.” He cupped her cheek, brushing her tears away with his thumb. “I don’t want to see you hurt yourself.”

She was sitting with her wrists in her lap. He pulled her in for a hug. Fuck, he knew how she felt. He watched the ghouls of Diamond City get murdered by his brother. Being a survivor had its own issues. He knew how it felt to feel guilty, like he could have done more. Finally she wrapped her arms around his chest and he buried his face in her hair. They sat there like that for a minute and he turned his head to adjust how he sat when he saw it on her arm. 

He grabbed her arm, holding it up. She tried to yank her hand away from him but he held a tight grasp on her wrist. “What is this?”

She kept trying to yank her arm back. “Nothing.”

“Why are you trying to hide it? Who hurt you?”

“No one, it’s fine.”

He grabbed her other wrist and saw the slash marks on that arm, too. Cuts that went from her wrist to elbow. “What happened?”

“Just leave it alone.”

“Why won’t you tell me?”

“What does it matter?”

“Cause if someone hurt you I want to kill them. But these look fresh, had to have happened today. Who did this?”

Her voice came out small. “I did. Leave it alone.”

He gulped. She hurt herself? “Why would you do this?”

“It makes me feel better.”

“Sunshine…” he pulled her in his arms again. “Please don’t do this. Let me help you.”

She sat back on the bed, sitting cross legged from him. “I just feel so lost. I lost everything when I married Nate, then I lost everything again the day I woke up in that vault.” Suddenly, she jumped up. “I forgot!” She ran to the closet were the record player was, and banged on a section of the wall. She found what she was looking for, and peeled back the wallpaper. Inside there was a dug out section with a box and photo album. The way she turned back to Hancock and looked at him, beaming a smile that melted his heart, made his breath catch. “Nate wanted me to destroy this stuff, it was part of my life, but I hid it. It’s still here!”

She set the stuff on the bed then turned back to the record player. “Let’s set the mood.” She thumbed through her records until she found one she liked. “This is Bad Religion. Their music became illegal but I saved a few records.” She put the record on and heavy drums banged out as a man sang about Los Angeles burning. It was angry music, angry and full of pain and wanting to change the world. It fit Zelda to a tee. She sat cross legged with him on the bed, the box and photo album in her lap. Gleefully she looked up at Hancock. “This is the life I had before that fuck.”

Hancock turned to sit across from her. Fuck, he hadn’t seen her this happy before. She showed him photos, pictures of her and her friends. They were all dressed crazy, dressed how raiders did now. Spiked hair and torn clothes. Pictures of them with their fist in the air, in large groups. She showed him picture after picture and he was getting an image of the person she was. She was fighting against those that hurt others. She worked underground to help people that were persecuted. She wanted to make the world a better place. 

His heart swelled more as he watched her singing along to the music. A song about sorrow, about how there would be no more sorrow. He knew he was right in following his instinct with her. She was just like him. He imagined if he knew her then, he would be right along beside her, flipping off these assholes that wanted to hurt people just for being different, for not fitting in their cookie cutter mold. 

Suddenly he reached over and grabbed her neck and she froze, eyes wide. He pulled her over for a kiss, just a sweet brush of lips. “I know I liked you for a reason, sunshine. Of the people, for the people.”

She smiled at him. “I liked my life before Nate.” Suddenly her face fell, and she looked down. “This was our home. Our bedroom. Our bed.” Her hand reached out and touched the mattress. “This place was my own personal hell in a perfect suburbia. He wanted the perfect wife. The smiling trophy on his arm, and he didn’t get it. He got me. He thought he could beat me into submission. I should have been happy. I was comfortable and set for life, would never want for anything. But I hated it. I could have just smiled and given him what he wanted. I tried to lose weight, to be skinny and pretty but it was never enough. This bed, this fucking bed.” 

She choked on the sob that came up through her chest. Hancock pushed the box and photo album to the side, and pulled her into his lap. “Sunshine, he is dead. He won’t hurt you again. Stop letting him live in your mind.”

“Fuck, he did it every night until I got pregnant. Then still did it for fun. He loved hurting me.”

“He ain’t here no more. He isn’t hurting you. Stop hurting yourself. Why did you come here, anyway? What are you doing?”

She sighed and set her head on his shoulder. “I was gonna get really, really, drunk and then overdose on med-x.”

Hancock froze up. He figured that was the plan, and was happy he caught her in time. “I don’t want you to do that.”

“Why not? There is no reason for me to exist here. I shouldn’t even be here.”

“Well, you are here. And fuck I am thankful for that. And while you are here, and you can continue the work you were doing before.” She looked up at him. “You know, before Nate. WOrking to make the world a better place. That is what I am trying to do. This world needs more people like you and me.” He grabbed her wrist. “But this shit doesn’t fly with me. No more of this. I am not going to sit by and watch you hurt yourself.”

“Then don’t watch.”

His mouth found hers through her smartass comment, and he pressed his tongue into her mouth. Fuck, she tasted like whiskey, smoke, and mutfruit. She turned to him in his lap and he groaned as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Sunshine, I care for you. A lot. Knowing all this about you now? Fuck, now I know why my instinct was screaming at me to keep you by my side. And I will do whatever it takes to make that happen. I will do everything I can to keep you from hurting yourself. I want you. I want you by my side.”

She looked into his eyes, and he got lost in the beautiful flecks of gold in her hazel eyes. “I don’t even know where to start.”

“I will help you. And actually, I have someone with me. He is in the living room and wants to talk to you. I think you will be very interested in what he has to say, I think it will be right up your alley.”

She jumped from his lap. “So this isn’t you trying to come find me because you are worried. You came with someone because you need something from me.”

He grabbed her wrists and pulled her back to him. “No. I came because I was worried. He just knew where to find you. I was sitting in Goodneighbor, losing my mind with worry after Daisy told me you bought out her med-x. I thought I was going to go feral. Then he came in and said he knew where you were from. I took the chance to come find you. He is harmless, and works with an organization that I have had good relationships with. This isn’t me using you. This is me, desperate to find you, scared to death that I lost you.”

“You have only known me a few days.”

“I know. It scares me so much, this pull that I feel to you. But like I said, I follow my instinct.”

At that, Deacon stepped in the doorway. “Well, you look bright eyed and bushy tailed. Name’s Deacon, and have I got an offer for you. I think you are going to like this, based on what I know from your past.”


End file.
